If your friend is suffering from a substance abuse disorder, you do not have to stand by and watch them destroy themselves and their relationships. By taking a proactive approach, you can help them get back on track to a better quality of life. Here is how to talk to a friend who is abusing substances.
1. Analyze the situation.
Although you are probably eager to talk to your friend about your concerns, you should first carefully analyze the situation so you know the best way to tackle the topic. Does your friend increasingly have problems with relationships, finances and the law due to their habit? How has their substance abuse been affecting you specifically? Also, speak to mutual friends and family members of the substance abuser to confirm that they have noticed the same issues.
2. Tell your friend how you feel.
In a place where you are unlikely to be overheard or interrupted, express your concerns to your friend. Have a prepared list that details the negative effects their substance abuse has been causing for them and others. Florida Attorneys Andrew Moses and Jay Rooth say substance abusers typically do not realize how many people can be harmed by their actions, especially if they have a habit of getting behind the wheel while under the influence. Bringing this situation into the open is essential to break through the wall your friend may have constructed to hide the substance abuse.
3. Avoid making your friend feel defensive.
Defensiveness is likely to result if you are accusatory or argumentative. Talk about the actions of your friend in relation to the substance abuse instead of assassinating their character. For example, tell them how much they mean to you and explain that you blame their behavior on the addiction rather than their intrinsic character. Avoid using inflammatory words that might upset them and cause them to shut you out.
4. Encourage your friend to get help.
You should enter this conversation with resources in mind that might help your friend escape from addiction. For example, substance abuse counselors and rehab clinics that are experienced in treating physical and mental aspects of substance cessation can be valuable. Tell your friend that you recognize the challenges they are facing and that they can count on you for support.
If your friend initially rejects your concerns, do not give up. Throughout this process, you can be a key element of their successful recovery. Knowing that their pattern of destructive behavior is no longer secret, your friend may begin to realize how damaging this behavior is and how much they can benefit from the resources you have suggested.
