Getting on with your Child’s Step-parent

 

When it comes to step-families, there is plenty of advice out there on how to be a good step-parent. And there is also advice for kids to help them get on with a new step-mum or step-dad. The issue that is often forgotten is that it’s also important that biological parents get on with the new step-parent too.If your ex has remarried or is in a long-term relationship and you have kids together, then it’s important for everyone that you can build a positive relationship with their new partner.

 

Of course, getting on with your ex’s new love is probably one of the most difficult relationship challenges but if children are involved, it’s worth making the effort to try and get along.

 

Things can be even more complex if your child lives with a step-parent for part of the week, or spends holidays with a step-family. It can be difficult to see your child living with someone you don’t know that well.

 

The key is good communication. If you’ve recently split up from a long-term partner, the last thing you’ll want to do is get to know their new girlfriend or boyfriend. But if their relationship becomes serious and you see that this new person is going to be a part of your children’s lives, then it is worth taking the time to bond with the new partner. If you can have a civil and grown-up relationship, your children will feel more secure and be happier with the changing dynamics of their family life.

 

Don’t make assumptions
It can be tempting to automatically dislike your ex’s partner without taking the time to get to know them. Instead of assuming that you won’t get on, try seeing them as a potential friend and don’t let any differences you have with your ex impact on your initial assessment of their new partner.

 

Be civil (even when you don’t feel it)
Set a good example for your children by always being polite when you speak to their step-parent and don’t bad-mouth them in front of the kids. If your children pick up on the fact that you don’t like their step-parent, they may feel that they have to dislike them too in order to show loyalty to you and this can make things difficult for everyone.

 

Clear communication
If your kids spend part of the week with a step-parent, then communication is essential. You all need to know if your child is upset about something or if they are having trouble at school. Don’t avoid having conversations with your ex and their new partner – make the time to chat so that you can all work together to support your children.

 

Don’t use your children as pawns or spies
If you don’t get on with your child’s step-parent, resist the temptation to drag your kids into any drama or confrontation that you may be experiencing. Of course, you’ll want to ask questions to make sure that your children are happy but don’t probe them for gossip about your ex and their new partner. Even young children can pick up on your real motives for asking particular questions and may feel that they have to lie to protect your feelings.

 

For more advice on step families, visit: www.happysteps.co.uk/Pages/default.aspx

Categories: child's, meeting, step parent

Five Creative Ways to Make Your Child"s Visit to the Dentist Enjoyable!

 

If you struggle to get your kids in the car and heading to the dentist, you’re definitely not alone. Kids sometimes need creative nudging from parents to make them want to get periodic checkups. Here are some helpful tips to have kids, if not wanting to visit the dentist, avoid dreading the experience.

 

Visit a Pediatric Dentist 

A pediatric dentist specializes in children’s healthcare. Waiting areas for pediatric dentists are normally dotted with kids’ favorite cartoon characters and fun games to play. This helps to drive down the amount of anxiety that kids (and parents) experience waiting for their names to be called.

 
Stay with Your Child 

Some pediatric dentists allow parents to accompany their children as they get their teeth cleaned or cavities filled. Depending on the child’s comfort level, mom or dad may be encouraged to sit with their son or daughter. All of these steps are meant to build comfort and reduce anxiety about visiting the dentist.

 

 

Shop Around 

Finding the right pediatric dentist can sometimes feel like a chore. Narrowing down the search with online review sites like Yelp and then following up with consultations with potential pediatric dentists is a great way to find the right one. Parents can quickly screen for a match between their child’s personality and the dentist over a half-hour talk.

 

 

Dental Presentation for Kids 

A big driver for fear is not knowing what’s around the corner. In other words, kids are sometimes afraid of the dentist because they don’t understand quite what visiting the dentist entails. DR. Peter Wong suggests attending a dental presentation hosted at a community center or school. This could, according to DR. Wong, help kids get acquainted with going to the dentist. Often a routine cleaning is demonstrated on a stuffed animal and the mood is kept light to help kids ease into the idea of visiting the dentist.

 

 

Read About It! 

There are dozens of fun books to get children excited about visiting the dentist. From “Melvin: The Magnificent Molar” to the Berenstain Bears series on visiting the dentist, books are a great way to show kids that visiting the dentist doesn’t have to be drudgery. You could also consider buying cartoon-themed toothbrushes to go along with some of these books.

 

http://www.childrensdentalgroup.com/10-books-to-get-your-children-excited-about-the-dentist/

 

Visiting the dentist doesn’t have to be painful for kids. Finding the right pediatric dentist or visiting dental presentations is a great way to allay your child’s fear over heading to the dentist.

 

Categories: child's, creative ways, Dentist, enjoyable, visit

Five Ways to Relieve Your Child"s Anxiety At The Dentist

 

By Karleia Steiner

 

A visit to the dentist doesn’t need to be synonymous with a visit to see the boogeyman. The fear that comes with dental visits is a learned one. If practiced while children are young, dental visits can be as cool as the mint mouthwash at the end of a cleaning. Listed below are five ways to relieve your child’s anxiety at the dentist.

 
1. Dental Hygiene Habits


As soon as a child receives their first tooth, make a big deal about it. Celebrate it as a milestone that marks their growth. Allow them to take a picture and proudly smile to show it off. While the excitement lingers, stress the importance of taking good care of the teeth. A child should own (and use) their special toothbrush, toothpaste and floss. Make it an unavoidable part of their daily routine. This will help oral health be viewed as a priority and a joy!

 

2. Regular Visits


As often as recommended by the dentist, make regular visits a priority. The more a child visits the dentist, the more they’ll get used to the environment and the anxiety will eventually dissipate.

 

3. Conversation 

A child will naturally ask questions about a visit to the dentist. Keep the conversation as positive and upbeat as possible. It’s important not to lie to a child but don’t use words that might scare them out of the chair like needle, drill, or bloody mess.

 

4. Choice of Dentist


Do personal due diligence and find a dentist that will cater to the needs and sensitivities of a child. Not all dentists know how to be kind and pleasant to little clients. Sometimes, dental visits for children might arrive with the infamous meltdown. Dentists with good bedside manor like Dr. Bryan Murrayare expectant of these situations from children and are well-equipped to handle them. Selecting the perfect dentist can literally make or break the situation so choose wisely.

 

5. Special Event


When it’s time to visit the dentist, make it a special event the child learns to be excited about. Create an itinerary for the day so that the dentist is just a stop in between other fun places like the zoo and the child’s favorite restaurant. With such a fun-filled day, it’s hard to make the dentist seem like a chore or an unwanted place to visit!

 

While these tactics can help relieve a child’s anxiety about a visit to the dentist, keep in mind that things may go south just because children are creatures of unexpected behavior. One minute, they might be excited. After sitting in the chair for a while, they might get frustrated. As the parent, be supportive, loving and compliant with what the dentist requests so that the experience can be a smooth as possible for everyone involved!

 

Categories: anxiety, child's, Dentist, general dentist