Working Your Woman: 6 Tips to Keep Her Happy in the Bedroom

As a man, your sexual health and wellness isn’t just about you getting yours; you also need to please your woman. Hitting her pleasure points boosts your sexual wellbeing as well as your partner’s, leading to better, all-over mind-blowing sex. Here are our tips and tricks to pleasing your woman – just make sure you don’t use them all up in one night!

 

1. The Pre-Coital Massage: Massage the length of your partner’s legs, starting at her upper thighs and working down to her ankles. Once you get down low, focus on your partner’s feet, kneading her heels and the soles. Stretch out each toe individually and, if hygiene allows, have a little suck – you’ll have her ready for the main event in no time.

 

2. Ask Her About it: You’re not a mind reader, so just ask your partner what she wants from you. According to Barbara Bartlik, MD, a professor of psychiatry at CornellUniversity, ‘Most women appreciate men who want to make sure they’re satisfied. If she notices you’re working hard to please her, she’ll be more likely to return the favour.’

 

3. Love Foreplay: It’s not about how often you give her foreplay; it’s about the quality. Michael Perry, PhD, a sex therapist in Encino, California, warns, ‘If you act as if you’re just going through the motions to get to the sex, she’s going to notice, and it will take longer for her to get excited. When a man is loving what he’s doing, it’s going to show through and turn her on, too.’

 

4. Go Gently on the G-Spot: While her clitoris is an obvious place that needs attention, you need to give it your focus in the right way. Cathy Winks, author of The Good Vibrations Guide to the G-spot, explains, ‘Direct stimulation of the clitoris can actually be painful. It’s much better to rub the clitoral hood [where the tops of the labia meet] or to rub along the side of the clitoris than it is to go straight for the head of it.’ Birch adds, ‘Focus on the clitoris, then don’t focus on the clitoris. The clitoris reacts best to being teased, so you want to lick it and suck on it a little, build a little tension, then back off on it a bit before going at it again.’

 

5. Kissing Keeps Her Going: When you get close, really close, to the end point, you can forget how you got here in the first place. Britton notes, ‘Women get their greatest erotic pleasure from frequent, passionate kissing. If you get the sense that she’s starting to lose interest, kissing is always the best way to bring her back into it.’ You don’t always need to frantically swab out her tonsils to show your passion; try to mix things up with an occasional closed-mouth kiss on her nose, eyes, and forehead.

 

6. The ‘Figure Eight’ Technique: When you’re giving full oral attention to her downstairs area, the super-sensitive area around her clitoris responds well to a figure-eight pattern. Start by gently sucking until the little button swells, and then carefully expose the area with your fingers. Circle the clitoris to the left with the slippery underside of your tongue, and then circle it to the right. Following on from this, use the rougher top side of your tongue to flick from right to left and then up and down. Finish by doing figure eights, alternating between your tongue’s smooth underside and firmer tip, and constantly varying the degrees of pressure you use.

Categories: clitoral stimulation, clitoris, Communication, figure, focus, kissing, nbsp, partner

How to Have the Hottest Make-Out Session Of Your Life!

We all love a good make out session, as it often leads to mind-blowing sex. However, you can sometimes forget how important kissing is to your sexual health. Once you’ve moved beyond kissing and onto, ahem, other things, you tend to focus on the more overtly sexual stuff as your goal. Yet kissing is a hotter form of foreplay than you realise, and can work wonders for your sexual wellbeing. Therefore, we’ve spoken to sex therapist Sonia Borg, PhD, author of Marathon Sex: Incredible Lovemaking Experiences Hotter and Longer Than You’ve Ever Done It Before and sexologist Jessica “Dr. Jess” O’Reilly, PhD, founder of sexwithdrjess.com, for their hottest tips for improving your kissing wellness.

 

1. Play with Your Positions: ‘How you angle your bodies affects the mood of your make-out sesh,’ say Borg and O’Reilly. ‘If you feel like being in charge, sit on his lap and wrap your legs around him so you’re kissing him from above. Want him to take the reins? Stand up so he towers over you (if he’s taller). A hot horizontal option is to kiss him while spooning—push your butt into his pelvis and grind against him.’

 

2. Sense His Breath: Though it sounds weird out of context, when you’re in the moment and you feel your partner’s breath on your mouth, there’s something very sensual about that. Borg and O’Reilly instruct, ‘Lightly brush your lips against his, letting the sensation of his exhales linger on your skin.’

 

3. Change Up Your Technique: Borg and O’Reilly note, ‘Changing up your technique builds excitement, so alternate between different mouth moves: Slide your tongue back and forth between his lips or against his gums. Swirl your tongue around his, then take his tongue into your mouth and suck on it the way you would his penis. Gently nibble his lower lip.’

 

4. Get in Sync: Borg and O’Reilly recommend, ‘For an incredibly soulful kiss, put your hand on your man’s heart and smooch in rhythm with his heartbeat.’

 

5. Get Your Hands in the Game: ‘Kissing isn’t just about the lips,’ Borg and O’Reilly point out. ‘Get creative with your hands, too. Seductively play with his fingers as though you were giving his digits a hand-job, passionately rub and grab at his inner thighs, or drag your fingers through his scalp and tug on his hair.’

 

6. Use Everything You’ve Got: Why stop at lips and hands, when you’ve got a whole body that can turn your partner on even more?  ‘Pulsate your groin against his,’ Borg and O’Reilly advise. ‘Try straddling him, undoing a couple of his shirt buttons, and then pressing your breasts against his chest. Or stroke yourself in tandem with your kisses, so he can see you getting aroused.’

 

7. Don’t Knock Dry-Humping: ‘There’s a reason every teenager in the book does it,’ Borg and O’Reilly argue. ‘Simulating sex (and watching each other get off in the process) makes actually doing it way steamier. While making out, thrust your hips into his, or grind your way up and down his leg.’

 

8. Pay Attention to His Ears and Eyes: Tell your partner just how badly you want him, and what you’re about to do to him. Even just a moan can make things feel naughtier, but if you’re feeling adventurous, something along the lines of, “I want you to plow inside of me,” is practically guaranteed to make him blow his load. With his eyes, Borg and O’Reilly point out, ‘Couples often neglect to make eye contact while getting it on. It’s the quickest, easiest way to instantly intensify things.’

Categories: borg, kissing, lips, nbsp, positions, reilly, reilly point, technique

First Time Sex – How to Make Sure it Goes Well

Having sex for the first time can be a nervwracking experience. You may worry that your sexual prowess will not match up to expectations, and your emotional wellness and wellbeing can be shaken by the idea that you may prove to be a disappointment between the sheets.

 

The pressure is particularly piled on when you read studies, such as a recent one conducted by a sex therapist, which says that most women consider first-time sex to be an indicator of how the relationship will progress.

 

There are plenty of things that you can do to make sure that everything goes well when in the sack with a new partner for the first time.

 

First of all, don’t forget about kissing. Women like the sensuality of kissing, and it also serves to reassure them that you are not simply interested in sex. Most women would not consider sex that was not precluded by a kissing session, and almost two thirds of women have reportedly ended a relationship because the kissing failed to live up to expectations, too. Don’t be a sloppy kisser – lightly tracer her lips with your tongue and alternate soft kisses with gently sucking on her lips.

 

When you are in bed, make sure you spend a good length of time on the upper regions of the body, before descending to anything southerly. Spend at least 15 minutes gently kissing and caressing her upper body before moving down. Most women need at least eight minutes before they are ready for direct clitoral stimulation, so double this to be on the safe side and then you can be sure that she’s ready for it.

 

If you receive the right encouragement, try out your oral skills too. Most women reported in a poll that they were happy for men to do oral sex during their first time in bed – and if you do it right it will reflect well on you.

Categories: Bed, first, kissing, minutes, nbsp, Sex, time, time sex, Women

Fun with Foreplay: Why Pleasing Your Partner is Essential

The female mantra of “we need more foreplay” has been a sexual health issue for years, so why, then, do men still think they can get away with a quick grope and a slip of the tongue before sex? True, there are some circumstances in which you can get away with even less than that – after all, we all like a quickie now and then. However, most of the time, women need more from their partners than a wham, bam, thank you mam. In order to ensure your relationship wellness is in good shape, you need to realise that sex is different for men and women. Your partner doesn’t need an hour, or even half an hour, of foreplay, but for her sexual being – and, consequently, yours – to be as good as it can, foreplay is essential.

 

The key thing to remember here is that making it worth her while is, ultimately, improving sex for you too. You may feel like you end up putting all the work in to getting her “ready” — boooring — but if you want to have more and better sex, you need to enjoy this process. The more you turn her on in preparation for sex, the more likely she will be to have an orgasm – and be extremely grateful and willing to repay the favour. Giving her a sexual experience she’ll never forget will leave her desperate for more, meaning you get more sex out of it – winner. To give her the moves that will drive her wild, there are a few things you need to learn about foreplay:

 

1. There’s no ultimate foreplay: Some men seem to think there’s such a thing as the “ultimate foreplay” but actually variation is better. While something may work wonders for her arousal, the “if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it mentality” doesn’t apply. Sure, bring back your classic moves now and then, but don’t just stick to the one tactic you know, otherwise things will get stale. Get to know some knew things your partner likes – and ask her if there’s anything she’d like you to try. She’ll be touched that you want to make her happy, and having her tell you what to do can be a real turn on for both of you.

 

2. Kissing and foreplay: When it comes to turn-ons, I don’t think there’s a bigger one for women than kissing – especially if you do it nice and slow. Kiss every inch of your partner’s body and – by the time you’re done – she’ll be pretty excited for the main event. In fact, you may find she won’t be able to wait until the kissing stops! By taking the time and kissing every part of her, you’re telling your partner that you love every part of her, and don’t just like her for her lady parts. If you only focus on her breasts and vagina, your partner may feel desensitised in these areas after a while. You don’t have to kiss her all over every time you have sex – again, this can get stale if you do it every time – but by ravishing her every now and then, you can enjoy the process of figuring out her secret erogenous zones, and using that knowledge to your advantage in the future.

 

3. Avoid the moves that she hates: Every woman is different, but generally, women don’t like repetitious movements, being too aggressive or rough, anything lacking imagination; getting hurt or having her clitoris missed out. All men make these mistakes in the bedroom because men tend to do what they would like to have done to them. Sometimes, she may be up for something a little more rough, but if you want to have aggressive sex and nothing else, perhaps you should have sex with another man.

Categories: Foreplay, kissing, nbsp, partner, time, ultimate foreplay, Variety, Women

Could a Passionate Kiss Help Revamp Things in the Bedroom?

Kissing may seem like something that only teenagers do at bus stops, but in actual fact a passionate kiss could be the key to safeguarding your sexual wellness and wellbeing.

 

Many couples who have been together for a period of time find that the ‘fireworks’ part of their relationship dies out. They may still be intimate and may still have sex, but most stop kissing passionately. This is not at all uncommon, but it is really important not to underestimate the power of a simple kiss.

 

Second only to the genitalia, the mouth has many nerve endings. It is extremely sensitive to the touch, and kissing can send pleasure signals all over the body.

 

There are many different types of kiss, of course, from the simple peck on the lips that you would give to your grandmother or similar family member, or the more romantic types of kisses. This is such an important subject that there are even whole books on the subject, detailing the different types of kisses that people can engage in. With so much incentive and variety, it is, therefore, rather sad that kisses seem to fade out of long-term relationships.

 

Couples also tend to find that sex can become a bit ‘mechanical’ in a long-term relationship. They describe it as like ‘scratching an itch’, which basically means that it is perfunctory and mutually satisfying, but that it is not mind-blowing or particularly thrilling. That doesn’t mean that mechanical sex is not pleasant, romantic and connecting – it could well be all these things – but it is probably not as passionate as the sex you enjoyed in the early days of the relationship.

 

The trick to reawakening the passion and getting past this mechanical sex could well be to bring kissing back into your relationship. Reintroduce kissing slowly – work at slowly touching one another more, being more affectionate and spending time together. Next time you have sex, move in to a passionate kiss. You will be surprised at where this could lead you!

Categories: Kiss, kissing, Long term, mechanical sex, nbsp, passionate, passionate kiss, relationship, Sex

Make Her Go Wild: How to Get the Most Out of Foreplay

Outercourse, foreplay, non-penetrative sex; whatever you want to call it, it’s important for your sexual health and wellness. There’s so much more to sex than just the end goal, and by focusing purely on intercourse, you could be missing out on something far more erotic and enjoyable. You may think that only women go for foreplay, but, trust me, it can benefit your sexual wellbeing too. So, the next time you’re getting intimate, why not try these techniques with your partner?

 

Kissing – Irrespective of your other qualities, if a woman doesn’t rate you as a kisser, she’s less likely to want to take things further. Kissing almost defines your entire sexual game so try mixing it up a bit. Let your mouth wander, especially to her neck. This is a particularly sensitive spot and you’ll enjoy it too when she returns the favour!

 

Breast stimulation – There’s no denying that breasts are amazing, and you can do so many sexual activities with them. However, whether you’re fondling, sucking or going for mammary intercourse (rubbing the penis between the breasts), remember that they are a part of her body and not a squeeze toy. If you want a chance to see them again, treat her breasts gently and with respect and only up the tempo if she likes it.

 

Mutual masturbation – At the same time, stimulate your partner’s vagina while she rubs your penis. This can be an absolutely mind-blowing experience that can last for hours, and it really bonds you as a couple.

 

Dry humping – Also known as grinding, dry humping is perfect if you’re stuck in a private place but can’t take your clothes off. It’s basically regular sex with your clothes on, but the clothes barrier adds an edge to the activity and ups the sexual tension.

 

Frottage – This means that you rub your penis against the outer shaft of her vagina. You may think if you’re getting that intimate you may as well go for regular sex, but the truth is most women get a more powerful orgasm from clitoral stimulation. So, frottage or rubbing is an amazing way to make your partner go wild.

Categories: Foreplay, Frottage, kissing

Would You Make Out on a First Date? 88% of Brits Would!

Would you have sex on the first date? It’s a little risky. Not only does sleeping with someone you know next-to-nothing about put your sexual health at risk, but you’re also playing pretty fast and loose with your emotional wellbeing. Most people ascribe to the three-date rule, which states that is it socially acceptable to sleep with someone on the third date. Ok so that at least delays the emotional risk of getting intimate too soon, but what about kissing? How many dates should you go on before it’s okay to lean in for a smooch? And do you draw the line at a peck or is a full-blown snog perfectly acceptable?

According to a new survey, most of us think it’s fine to go ahead and make out on the first date. The survey, which was commissioned in celebration of the UK’s National Kissing day on June 20^th, found that 88% of Brits believe it perfectly acceptable to kiss on the first date. In these modern times, perhaps its no surprise, but what happens when you break down the results in terms of gender? Just 5% of male respondents reported that kissing on the first encounter is out of the question, while 13% of female respondents would never kiss on the first date. Likewise, twice as many men (11%) as women (6%) regularly go in for the kiss on the first date.

However, while men are more open to puckering up on the first date, that doesn’t mean that women are still waiting around for him to make the first move. According to the poll, which was conducted by dating website mysinglefriend.com, 79% of women said they’d have no problem with leaning in first. Website founder Sarah Beeny commented, ‘Attitudes to dating and first date kisses have changed in recent years. We are starting to shake off that stigma that can sometimes be attached to “making the first move”. It’s great to see that both men and women are growing alike in confidence, and becoming more open about the dating scene. We are slowly shaking off that cringe factor.’

Categories: first date, kissing, Research