Relationship Resilience: How to Spot Signs of Trouble

When you’re in a relationship for a long time, it’s easy to miss the signs that the wellbeing of the relationship isn’t all-that great. This is why Brent Bradley, PhD, an Associate Professor of Family Therapy, and James Furrow, PhD, is Professor of Marital and Family Therapy, have written about the warning signs of relationship trouble – and ways to build a more resilient relationship through complementary wellness – in their book Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy For Dummies. So what are the signs your relationship is in trouble?

 

• Arguments Go Unresolved: According to Bradley and Furrow, ‘Most couples have common issues they argue about, but when couples find they can’t get to a resolution of key issues in their relationship, the relationship is in trouble.’ Do your arguments involve criticism, defensiveness, and contempt? Bradley and Furrow explain, ‘When conflicts take on patterns that include attacks against a partner’s character, mind reading, counter-complaining, and insults or name calling, damage is being done to the emotional security of the relationship.’


• You Walk on Eggshells: ‘If you find yourself avoiding topics and protecting yourself from conflicts in your relationship, this is a sign that there is a lack of safety in the relationship,’ Bradley and Furrow note. ‘If you no longer trust your partner with emotional vulnerability, your relationship is at risk… Shared vulnerability is how partners show and share intimacy. When partners stop depending on each other, their relationship loses its importance and closeness is lost.’


• You Don’t Spend Much Time Together: ‘Partners who chose to spend less time together without purpose are often enacting emotional disengagement,’ say Bradley and Furrow. ‘Time is a crucial resource for sustaining intimacy.’


• Anger and Frustration Has Become Apathy and Indifference: Bradley and Furrow warn, ‘Partners who give in to apathy and indifference are moving away from the relationship. Active acceptance of an unresolved difference or disagreement is purposeful. Giving up on an issue can be a step toward giving up on the relationship.’


• You Try to Control the Circumstances: ‘Controlling actions are a common way in which injured or fearful partners respond to insecurity in their relationship,’ Bradley and Furrow comment. ‘These efforts at control undermine efforts to rebuild trust.’


• You Fear Criticism Towards Your Personal Thoughts: Bradley and Furrow point out, ‘A common sign of insecurity is fear of your partner’s lack of care and concern. Managing this fear through withdrawal is a short-term solution to eroding trust, which can threaten a long-term relationship.’

 

If these things sound familiar, or you just want to strengthen your relationship, Bradley and Furrow provide the following tips for relationship resilience.

 

1. Be Available and Responsive to Each Other’s Needs: Bradley and Furrow assert, ‘Being responsive when your partner needs you to listen after a tough day, or needs you to pick up the kids in a bind — these types of things show that you care.’

 

2. Tell Stories About Ways You’ve Overcome Difficulties as a Couple: ‘Taking a look at what you’ve overcome together pinpoints your successes,’ note Bradley and Furrow. ‘Negatives can steal away the positive accomplishments if you aren’t careful.’

 

3. Face Fears and Share Needs as a Couple: Bradley and Furrow detail, ‘The most successful couples confide in each other when life throws a real curveball. If you’re scared that you’ve really hurt the other, for example, step up to the plate and admit it, and then share that you don’t want to be that kind of a person.’

 

4. Reminisce: Invest ‘in memories and activities that remind you how important you are to each other,’ Bradley and Furrow instruct. ‘Make a list of places and activities that you enjoy together, and act on it.’

Categories: bradley, closer connection, family therapy, furrow, nbsp, Partners, relationship, relationship bradley, relationship resilience, Relationships, ve overcome, warning signs

How to Manage and Control Your Bipolar Disorder

Although bipolar disorder is a major health concern, that’s not to say that you cannot help yourself. Aside from the treatment or medications you’re given by your medical team, you can do much to look after your own wellbeing, manage your moods and stay balanced. We’ve rounded up the best things you can do to ensure your wellness:

 

1. Get involved in your treatment: Your treatment process will go so much better if you become a full and active participant. Learn everything you can about bipolar disorder, from your treatment options to all the symptoms, so you can recognise them yourself. Once you’re well-informed, you can collaborate with your doctor or therapist in the treatment planning process. Your programme will change all the time, so it’s important to work as your healthcare provider’s partner, and keep channels of communication alive and well. Be honest about your symptoms and any medication side effects.

 

2. Keep track of your symptoms and moods: It is essential that you are closely attuned to the way you feel, as it’s far better to discern the early warning signs of a mood swing than to wait for full-blown mania or depression. By the time mood swings are apparent to most people, it’s often too late to do anything to stop it so closely monitor subtle changes in your mood, sleeping patterns, energy level, and thoughts. Also try to identify the triggers, or outside influences, that have led to mania or depression in the past.

 

3. Be prepared: If you do spot any warning signs of mania or depression, it’s helpful to have a wellness toolbox of coping skills and activities to draw from. These things will be unique to you, but many bipolar sufferers often find certain practises helpful; talking to a supportive person, getting a full eight hours of sleep, cutting back on your activities, attending a support group, calling your doctor or therapist, doing something fun or creative, exercising, writing in your journal, increasing your exposure to light and cutting back on sugar, alcohol, and caffeine.

 

4. Get ready for emergencies: For those times in which you experience a relapse into full-blown mania or severe depression, you need to have an emergency action place in place that someone else can follow. Your action plan should include a list of emergency contacts, a list of all medications you are taking (including dosages), a list of any other health problems you have, your treatment preferences and a list of symptoms that indicate you need others to take responsibility for your care.

 

5. Find the right support: While taking charge of your own health is important in bipolar disorder, having a strong support system is vital to staying happy and healthy. As well as surrounding yourself with supportive individuals, you also need to avoid or limit contact with people who drain your emotional energy or leave you feeling discouraged, ashamed, or guilty. This is good advice for anyone to follow, but especially for those who suffer with bipolar disorder – why wouldn’t you just want to spend time with people who truly value you and make you feel better?

 

6. Develop a daily routine: Every little thing you do in life has a significant impact on your mood. By building a structure into your life – including set times for sleeping, eating, socializing, exercising, working, and relaxing – you can help stabilise your mood swings. Regular exercise is vital for treating depression, so try to incorporate at least 30 minutes of activity five times a week into your routine. This can be as simple as going for a walk.

Categories: bipolar, bipolar disorder, blown mania, depression, Disorder, Education, Mood Swings, nbsp, Support, treatment, warning signs

Quirk or Cause for Concern? Nine Signs Your Dog Needs a Vet

The chances are that you dog does a lot of weird stuff, and that’s just why you love her, but how do you know when her little quirks are actually a sign that her wellbeing is in trouble? She’s not just man’s best friend; she’s family, so how do you get family wellness back on track? Ask yourself the following questions:

 

1. Does she have odd eating habits?

On a hot day, it’s not unusual for your dog to skip the odd meal. However, if she goes for two days without eating, or begins raiding the kitchen cupboards and bins when she’s usually well-behaved, it’s time to take her to the vet.

 

2. Is she always thirsty?

As dogs naturally produce a lot of saliva, an excessive need to drink is cause for concern. If your furry little friend keeps urinating, she may have a kidney disease or diabetes.

 

3. Is her coat rough or dry?

Your dog’s coat should be thick, shiny, and soft, so if it is otherwise she may be eating the wrong kind of food, or have an allergy or skin disease.

 

4. Is she sluggish or tired?

If your dog simply isn’t interested in going for a walk or playing, it may just be because of the heat or sore muscles. However, if it goes on for more than two days you should consult a vet.

 

5. Has she been vomiting?

It’s not unusual for dog’s to vomit to get rid of something that doesn’t agree with them, but if your dog is vomiting frequently, several times in a row, is vomiting blood or she has a fever, you should call the vet as soon as possible.

 

6. What does her stool look like?

Unless your dog’s stool is small, firm and moist, you should be wary. If, for more than two days, your dog’s stool is dry or hard, contains blood or mucus, or your dog is constipated or has diarrhoea, visit your vet immediately.

 

7. Have there been any sudden changes to her weight?

Sudden weight loss of 10% or more should be brought to your vet’s attention. Remember, if your dog is only small, this could be as little as one pound.

 

8. What do her eyes look like?

Your dog may have an infection if her eyes are cloudy, red, squinty or producing excessive discharge. This can easily be sorted with medication from the vet.

 

9. Is she scooting or dragging her rear?

This is an indication that your dog has worms, blocked anal glands, kidney disease or diabetes.

Categories: days, Disease, Dogs, eating, kidney disease, nbsp, stool, Vet, vet nbsp, warning signs

How to Spot the Warning Signs of Different Types of Cancer

There’s no bigger health concern than cancer, but a lot of people can’t recognise when the disease affects their wellbeing. It’s important to get annual checkups and tests, but there are also a lot of cancer symptoms that are commonly overlooked which, if spotted early, may make all the difference to your wellness. Here are the 20 common cancer signs to watch out for:

 

1. Upset stomach or stomach ache: This is one of the first signs of colon cancer, but also occurs in leukaemia, pancreatic and liver cancer patients.

 

2. Acid pains in your stomach: This feels like gas or heartburn in your upper or middle abdomen, which is often aggravated by eating. It’s often a sign of liver cancer.

 

3. Unexplained weight loss: When the pounds are falling off despite not making any changes to your lifestyle, it could be a sign of colon and other digestive cancers.

 

4. Jaundice: This is a sign of pancreatic cancer, and includes symptoms such as yellowing of your skin and eyes have yellowed, darker than usual urine, clay-coloured stools and itching.

 

5. Wheezing or shortness of breath: This is one of the first signs of lung cancer, but as it can also signal asthma, COPD and heart disease, it’s worth getting checked out anyway.

 

6. Chronic cough or chest pain: Though several types of cancer, such as leukaemia and lung tumours, mimic a bad cough or bronchitis, you can tell its cancer if the problem persists, rather than coming and going in cycles.

 

7. Frequent fevers or infections: Leukaemia saps your body’s ability to fight fevers and infections, and causes frequent feelings of achiness, and flu-like symptoms.

 

8. Trouble with swallowing: If you have a frequent feeling of needing to clear your throat or that food is stuck in your chest, it could signal lung cancer or throat cancer.

 

9. Chronic heartburn: Regular heartburn and an acidic taste in the throat can trigger a condition called Barrett’s oesophagus, which may be a precursor of oesophageal or throat cancer.

 

10. Facial swelling: Small cell lung tumours block the blood vessels in your chest, which limits blood flow to your face and causes puffiness, swelling, or redness.

 

11. Lumps on your neck, underarm, or groin: Depending on where it occurs, lumps or swollen lymph nodes could indicate leukaemia or throat cancer, especially if they’re painless.

 

12. Excessive bruising or bleeding: This is another sign of leukaemia, as it suggests something abnormal happening with your platelets and red blood cells.

 

13. Weakness and fatigue: This is a symptom of many different cancers, especially if it doesn’t respond to getting more sleep.

 

14. Rectal bleeding: Blood in you stool or in the toilet alone is a common symptom of colorectal cancer.

 

15. Bowel problems: If constipation, diarrhoea, and changes in stools go on for more than a few days without a clear cause, it may be colon or pancreatic cancer.

 

16. Trouble urinating: Changes and difficulties in urination are commonly associated with prostate cancer.

 

17. Pain or burning during urination: Although it may be a urinary tract infection or sexually transmitted disease, pain during urination can also indicate prostate cancer.

 

18. Blood in your urine or semen: This is a sign of prostate cancer.

 

19. Erection problems: While it may be a sign of erectile dysfunction, erection problems can be a sign that your prostate cancer has progressed.

 

20. Pain, aching, or heaviness in your groin, hips, thighs, or abdomen: Men with testicular cancer report noticing a heavy, aching feeling low in the belly and/or testicles, and the condition also causes swelling in the hips, legs and back.

Categories: colon cancer, prostate cancer, warning signs

Your Child"s Health:Signs Your Child May be Hard of Hearing

Hearing loss is a common genetic disorder; in fact, approximately 1.4 out of every thousand children born in the United States has some form of hearing impairment. Even children who test normal as infants can develop a hearing impairment over time.

 

Early Intervention

When it comes to hearing loss, early intervention is important. Babies who are treated for hearing loss before six months of age tend to keep up with their peers as far as language skills. Those who receive delayed treatment often experience language delays or speech impairments. School-age children with untreated hearing loss may have trouble in school and may even be identified as trouble makers due to a perceived inability to follow direction.

 

Early Testing

It is important for children to be screened early. Babies as young as one month of age can benefit from hearing aids. Many hospitals offer in-hospital testing within a few days of birth, according to an expert of hearing aids Arizona. If you as the parent or caretaker can recognize the hearing loss early, you can help decrease the chance of having other developmental problems such as delayed speech.

 

Risk Factors

There is a genetic link for hearing loss. More than half of all children who experience hearing loss have a family member with a similar condition. Other risk factors include prenatal exposure to an infection, such as CMV or toxoplasmosis, premature birth, chronic ear infections and severe head trauma.

 

Warning Signs in Babies

Infants have a natural startle reaction to loud noises. Those not showing signs of this reaction should be tested, even if they passed the newborn screening. By three months, the child should start to recognize the sounds of his or her parents’ voices, and, by six months, the child should be able to turn or look at the source of a sound, whether it be the parents voice or a melody. Children with partial hearing loss may also seem to respond to certain sounds but ignore others. By one year of age, the child should begin to say simple words.

 

Warning Signs in Older Children

Delayed and thick speech is a major concern in older children. By age two, parents and other caretakers should be able to understand about half of what the child says. By age four, speech should be clear enough that even strangers understand what the child is saying. Children who are not reaching the milestones for their age group may be experiencing some form of hearing loss or other developmental delay that should be addressed.

 

It is important for caregivers to keep an eye on the child’s development. Hearing loss can present itself in several ways. The good news is that early intervention and treatment can help the child reach their developmental milestones.

Categories: Child, early intervention, health, hearing aids, hearing impairment, hearing loss, loss early, nbsp early, nbsp warning, risk factors, signs, warning signs