No one finds break ups fun or easy (and if someone says otherwise, they’re lying!). You can tell yourself it will be alright in the end, but the meantime can be a mean time so what can you do to speed up the process and get that break up behind you ASAP?
According to Dr. Daniel G. Amen, author of The Brain in Love, ‘When we love someone, they…actually occupy nerve-cell pathways and physically live in the neurons and synapses of the brain. When we lose someone through a break up our brain gets disoriented. Since the person lives in neural memory connectors, we expect to see them, hear them, feel them and touch them. When we cannot touch or talk to them as we usually do, the brain centres where they live become inflamed looking for them.’
So break ups, then, affect you physically, which means that you can get back on track using practical, tangible methods. Start by brewing up some St. Johns Wart Tea. Break ups initiate a fight-or-flight response, which means your brain often reacts with depression, anger and sadness, as well as irrationality and hyper-sensitivity. Though it sounds a bit loopy, St. John’s Wart – whether in tea or pill form – relaxes your feelings of anxiety and brings your brain back to a natural state.
While you’re sipping your mug of St. John’s wart, crack out the dark chocolate! No, this isn’t another romantic comedy moment in which you binge on chocolate while crying and singing along to “All by myself”, but chocolate is a practical way to help your brain. When eaten in moderation, dark chocolate has a positive effect on your wellbeing and cognitive health, as it contains phenylethylamine (PEA). This is chemical your brain creates when you’re falling in love, releasing endorphins and boosting your mood.
Finally, show yourself some love. This means loving yourself in the sense of doing nice things for yourself, and staying healthy, but your brain will also benefit if you love yourself in the, ahem, dirtier sense of the phrase. Having an orgasm gives your brain a rush of serotonin and dopamine, which will increase your mood and make you feel like a sexual person again. Just because you’re not having sex with your ex anymore doesn’t mean you should stop having sex with yourself, and what better way to show yourself that you really don’t need him!
Breaking Up is Hard to Do: How to Get Back on Track
