Does Positive Thinking Work?

 

Written by Jenny Catton

 

We’re used to everyone from television celebrities to self-help gurus endorsing the benefits of positive thinking. And thinking positively has been linked to everything from becoming successful in business to recovering from a serious illness. But does positive thinking actually work?

 

Yes – Sunita
I’m a firm believer in the power of positive thinking and have used the concept to achieve many great things in my life. When I was made redundant five years ago, I decided not to feel sorry for myself but instead saw the redundancy as an opportunity to change my life for the better. I wrote a list of the goals I wanted to achieve over the next five years and by using positive thinking techniques quickly began to see dramatic changes in my life. I now have a job that I love and have recently moved into my dream home.

The key to positive thinking is to think big – decide what you really want from life without worrying about how you are going to make it happen. For example, if you decided you wanted to be a lawyer but didn’t have the right qualifications it would be easy to think “oh, that will never happen”. But by thinking positively; spending time to clearly visualise yourself as a lawyer and really believing that it will happen, your subconscious mind takes over and finds a way to make your dreams a reality.

One of my goals was to own my own home but I didn’t know how I would be able to afford it. So rather than dwelling on the practicalities I used positive thinking to picture myself in my dream home. Shortly after that, I received a promotion at work which meant I could afford to save for the deposit on a new house. I believe this is all thanks to my positive thinking.

 

No – Andrew
To suggest that you can make things happen just by thinking positively is a load of rubbish. You can’t achieve anything in life just by wishing for it; you have to be practical and work hard to get what you want. There are lots of books and even courses that promise to teach people how to use positive thinking to get the life they dream of but I think these give people false hope and make people lazy. You can spend as much time as you like writing down goals and picturing a better life for yourself but unless you actually get on and take action, you won’t ever achieve the things you want to.

I think promoting positive thinking at the expense of common sense can also be harmful. For example, I’ve heard of cancer patients who have been told that if they use positive thinking techniques, they will get better. This might be useful for some but could be dangerous if it makes people believe they can ‘think themselves better’, rather than accepting the medical treatments that they need.

People who believe in positive thinking often say that being pessimistic won’t get results. But in life, you have to be realistic. If you want a new career, for example, it’s better to focus on the skills you already have rather than wishing you could be a film star or a model. It can be disheartening to constantly strive for the best things in life if they are unattainable.

Categories: catton, dream home, jenny, life, nbsp, people, positive, positive thinking, Thinking, thinking positively, thinking techniques, work nbsp, written

Live Long and Foster: Strong Relationships Benefit Health

If you’re taking care of family wellness, there’s one thing you need; other people. Obviously, you need more than just you to make a family, but research shows that connecting with others is vastly beneficial to your wellbeing. Not only does interaction raise your spirits, but it also does wonders for your health.

 

According to the results of prominent researcher Sheldon Cohen, PhD, from Carnegie Mellon University in Pittsburgh, if you form close bonds with other people, you’ll live for longer than those who don’t foster meaningful relationships. In one of his studies, Dr Cohen analysed the autobiographies of 96 psychologists and 220 literary writers for words that indicated close relationships, such as father, mother, neighbour, sister, brother etc. The writers who used the most of these words in their stories had lived for longer than those who used these terms less often. Moreover, a 2007 study from University College London found that people who have more negative interactions in their closest relationships are more likely to develop heart disease.

 

So how do you strengthen your relationship wellness?

 

1. Accept the things you cannot change. People are different and flawed and, no matter how hard you try, you’re never going to fix the things you don’t like about someone. Love the people in your life for the people that they are, warts and all.

 

2. Accentuate the positive. You can choose to look at annoying habits in others as deal breakers or irritants, or you can try to see them as charming quirks. That’s just part of who they are, and you might even miss those little annoying behaviours if they were gone.

 

3. Show your appreciation. Even if your loved ones are “supposed” to do certain chores, make sure you say thank you – a little gratitude goes a long way.

 

4. Walk a mile in their shoes. Your style of handling conflict or difficult situations may be different to the other person’s. You may rather hash it all out, but your loved one may be an internal processor, and would prefer to think things through alone. Accept the difference, and try to adjust the way you interact.

Categories: Acceptance, Appreciation, health, live, longer, nbsp, people, positive thinking, Relationships, strong relationships

Could Meditation Be The Key to Learning Compassion?

Recently the journal Psychological Science published a study by PhD student Helen Weng, which suggested that adults can learn how to be more compassionate by listening to meditation CDs, or repeating positive phrases such as ‘may you have joy and happiness’. This research focuses on how people can encourage and maintain positive thinking, and is the principle area of study for the Centre for Investigating Healthy Minds. This began after the 14th Dalai Lama had challenged a professor of meditation to study positive feelings, attitudes and behaviours in humans. Weng herself was able to present her research to the Dalai Lama.

 

The study was developed after the researchers had observed Buddhist monks practicing compassion meditation, and found that their brain patterns differed significantly from normal people. It was then suggested that if a regular person could feel the benefits of compassion meditation within a short period of time, this could provide a useful form of therapy and behavioural change, as well as improving general mental wellness.

 

The meditation works by attempting to evoke compassion. Usually, the meditation is done with someone who you love and care about. You imagine a time where they might be suffering or in pain, and then you repeat compassionate phrases wishing them to be free of suffering. This is then done to the self, imagining a time when you were or might be in pain, and repeating the phrases to yourself. Weng stated that a lot of people can be harsh on themselves, and then self-compassion is a useful and important way to boost self-esteem and confidence. This is done a third time to a real or imagined stranger, and lastly is done to a person you dislike, which can be hardest of all.

 

In the study participants used meditation CDs online, and practiced compassionate meditation for two weeks, and found that those who practiced the meditation were far more compassionate, kind and forgiving than those who had not. Often positive emotions are ignored by modern research, but as such an important aspect of wellness, studies and investigations into feelings of compassion, forgiveness and generosity are becoming more and more popular.

Categories: compassion, meditation, positive thinking

How Can You Get Back on Track After Sexual Trauma?

Sexual trauma affects one in four women and one in six men in their lifetime. As this month is National Sexual Assault Awareness and Prevention Month, this is a good time to think about how self-care can benefit your sexual health, and overall wellbeing, if you have been directly or indirectly affected by sexual trauma. Self-care involves respecting, valuing and having consideration for yourself, as you need to love yourself in order to grow, heal and take pride in your emotional and physical wellness.

Seeking immediate medical attention is the first step toward self-love and self-care when you have been impacted by sexual trauma. There are many places to contact, such as your doctor, local rape crisis centre or emergency room. Taking care of any internal or external medical issues can help you to prevent complications down the road. Even if some time has passed since you suffered sexual trauma, you should still get yourself checked out. There are also other aspects of physical self-care. You need to eat well to look after your body, sleep for roughly seven to 10 hours every night, and exercise. These things will work to improve your mood and increase your release of endorphins, or your brain’s “feel good” hormone.

Challenging negative thoughts can help you to feel better about yourself and change the way you view your world. Try making a list of at least three positive facts about yourself, and keep it with you at all times. Ask those you know for things to put if you get stuck – they may love something about you that you never realised about yourself before – and when a negative thought comes to mind, you can pull out this list to review your positive qualities.

On a daily basis, create and repeat positive affirmations, even if you do not feel like it. Saying something as simple as ‘I know I’ll feel better soon’ can help you experience the world in a more positive way. In a similar vein, take stock of all your daily accomplishments, and praise yourself for them every day. When you do have negative thoughts or emotions, forgive yourself for them. Shock, anger, sadness and fear are natural and common to feel if you or a loved one has experienced sexual trauma, and while it’s good to move on towards positive thinking, it’s a process which takes time and a lot of love.

How Can You Get Back on Track After Sexual Trauma?

Categories: positive thinking, self care, Sexual Trauma

Shining Positivity into your Negative Corners

We all want to be the best at what we do. The Sherlock in our own brand of expertise – but there is always something stopping you, pulling you back.

From the tedious term “experience” to the deterring “impossibility”, there always seems to be a clause that you’ve missed or disregarded, but always seems to catch up on you. It’s funny however, that the majority of these words often come from yourself.

You’re your life’s biggest critic and ultimately, you can become your own downfall. It goes without saying however that negative thinking is a very serious, but incredibly human, habit that is difficult to kick down once it has made itself known.

It is easy to look in hindsight and think, “I wish that I had done this or that,” – but the truth is that this only holds us back, keeping us in the past, rather than jumping into the future. Of course, the problem then is finding the motivation to do so.

There are 3 ways of overcoming this problem. So, sit back, drink a hot beverage, gnaw on a biscuit and relax:

Ignore that Negative Thinking: It’s easier said than done, but for every negative thought, they are both misleading and untrue. Try to reverse them – experiment and play, as long as you break the cycle of breaking down your confidence. If those negative thoughts come to devour you, turn around and tell them, “Not today.”

Try Out New Things: In the space of 18 months, a man sat down and started drawing for nine hours every day. Each time he practised, the better that he became. It was an entirely new concept, full of possibilities – he is now a very popular artist – all because he attempted something different. The real path to success is not by studying the degree or getting the references, but by doing something that fires up your passion. It is quite common for a lot of people now to be unsure of who they are, what they want to be and why. All it takes is finding what you are truly good at. Take classes, read books, see films – find what grabs you the most within the material. Is it the graphics? The plots? Cookery? Science? The arts? What intrigues you? Find them – maybe your dream career is hiding under your nose.

Internalise the Positive, Use the Negative: Before, it was mentioned that you are your greatest critic. For artists, many take the criticisms as advice – what can you do better, how to improve on what you’re doing and more. Ignore the people that doubt you – reflect upon yourself, write down the negatives if you have to – but then find ways of reversing them.

Everyone makes mistakes – it’s a very human thing to do; but the fear of failure is what tends to drive people down. Believing that you can do something, against all odds, brings respect from your colleagues, the knowledge to survive – and more importantly, trust in yourself.

Shining Positivity into your Negative Corners

Categories: corporate wellness, critic, emotional, ignore, Mental Health, negative, negative thinking, people, positive thinking, Thinking, Wellbeing