How Can You Spot the Signs of an Abusive Relationship?

It’s been proven that women who endure or witness an abusive relationship as they grow up are more likely to become victims of abuse as an adult. However, they aren’t the only ones. Any woman can fall in love with someone who disguises their abusive side, only to reveal it later on into a relationship. Every woman should be aware of the red flags of abuse so that they can maintain a healthy relationship, and get out quickly if the relationship begins to turn sour. Abusers notoriously hide their true nature in the early stages of a relationship – if they acted the way they do towards the end, no victim of abuse would stick around. However, in most cases, abusers are manipulative and hone their skills to entrap people into believing that the abuse is something that’s deserved. Both good and bad relationships begin with a honeymoon period, where everything is new and exciting. There’s no much to learn about your new partner that you feel excited about spending all of your time with them. He is attentive and crazy about her – he begins to talk marriage and kids, which makes you feel uneasy and rushed. However, because he seems so perfect and everything you’ve ever dreamed of finding in a man, you convince yourself that he is right for you.

 

In a healthy relationship, a woman feels safe to express her opinions and concerns when she feels them. Her partner would respect her thoughts and listen to her views. However, communication is very one sided in an abusive relationship and a woman may feel threatened or ignored by her partner. He may pressure her sexually and force her into things that she wouldn’t normally do. The tension may begin to increase in the relationship, and he may begin to use phrases such as ‘Don’t you love me?’ or ‘If you loved me you would do this – while it may sound like he is craving her love on the surface, the reality is that he is using her love against her as blackmail. As the relationship progresses, he may begin to stop her going out or deciding who she spends her time with. Violence may quickly follow, where your partner feels as though he has created a period of tension that has lasted long enough where he is justified in verbally or physically abusing you. Afterwards, he will apologise and beg for forgiveness, promising that it will never happen again. This cycle will inevitably begin again and again, until you find yourself in a relationship that it wholly predictable but that you’ll struggle to get out of.

When you begin to see these warning signs, you need to walk away from the relationship. The man that you thought you were in love with is merely a facade, and the man in your relationship will continue to abuse and emotionally scar you. The only way to end the hurt from an abusive relationship is to leave it – while this may seem difficult and upsetting, it is nothing in comparison to the hurt and emotional heartache you’ll suffer if you stay. Abusers are very skilled at tricking their partners into believing that they are telling the truth but this is only acting at its best. If you are worried that you’re in a relationship that may be becoming abusive, you may find it useful to speak to someone about your problems so that they can advise you how to deal with them – a counsellor or your GP may be helpful with these matters.

Categories: abuse, abusive, abusive relationship, abusive relationships, healthy relationship, partner, relationship, romantic relationships, woman

Great Ways to Keep the Sexual Chemistry Alive

If you want to take your sex life to the next level for a closer and more intimate relationship, foreplay is the best way to do it. But finding the time between busy work schedules, dropping the kids off at school and trying to maintain a social life can be difficult. The passion that you crave can be easily be reignited through making more an effort with your sex life, and this comes down to foreplay – there are many ways that you can make foreplay a more integral part of your sex life, rather than a prequel to the upcoming events.  Here are some ways you can integrate foreplay into your relationship for spark that passion and excitement you’re looking for.

Many men enjoy anal play, so your partner may have already tried massaging his own prostate when he’s been masturbating. It can be a fun addition to your sex life though, so why not give it a go? You can try doing a manual massage by lubricating your fingers and inserting them into his anus as he breathes and pushes out. Curve your finger towards his belly button until you feel a ridge, which you can stroke. If you’d rather, you can also use a sex toy designed for anal play. There are many on the market now and they can make your sex life all the more exciting. Remember those exciting first months of your relationship, when you were still getting to know each other? Re-visit those days by picking each other up at a bar and flirting with each other as though you are strangers. Act like you don’t know each other and begin flirting with each other – it can be a great turn on and a thrilling way to start the foreplay before you’ve even got home.

Blindfold add to the thrill of sex with your partner and add another dimension of electricity. The anticipation and imagination of a touch you can’t see is incredibly exciting, and you may be surprised by how much you both enjoy it. Use a blindfold and begin with like strokes and touches, building up the frequency and pressure so you can build up to a strong climax. You can even use rose petals or feathers on your partner, rather than just your hands, so as to keep them guessing. Make sure that it’s done in a safe and trusting environment, and that you’ve set out the rules of the game before you begin so you both feel secure.

Why not practice saying no, instead of yes, to really spice things up? Trick your partner into thinking sex is off limits, and then tease them – do a strip tease, wear some sexy lingerie and show them what they’re missing, without letting them actually touch you. It will drive them crazy and really build the tension between you. Learn something new together to build the romance and intimacy between you both. It can be anything from a dance class to cooking, just spending some time together can be great for your sex life. And if your new skill lends itself well to your sex life, then so much the better! Why don’t you rekindle the romance by writing your partner a love letter? Be bold about how you feel about them, what you love about your relationship and the things you’d like to do to them. It can be as creative as you want – this is your time to say the things you may not feel confident saying in person.

Categories: anal play, feel, Foreplay, life, partner, relationship, romantic relationships, sex life, sexual experience

What to do When You’re Not in the Mood for Sex

Sex is an important part of any relationship and when one of you isn’t really feeling in the mood, it can put stress on your love life. It’s easy to fall into the trap of running out of time to have sex, from those work emails you have to respond to, to putting the laundry away and doing the washing up – life can get on top of you and before you know it, it’s been ages since you had sex. But once you put the to-do list as a higher priority than your romance, it can spell disaster for other areas of your relationship too. There are ways out of this predicament though. The first way to do this is to embrace the concept of the quickie. Sex doesn’t have to be a marathon session every time in order to be enjoyable, so why not sneak in a quick sex session before work or on your lunch break? It will keep the passion alive and enable you to keep the romance in your relationship. Try keeping the attention on your partner instead of your mundane schedule – leave sexy notes for your partner, surprise them with sex when they’re least expecting it or doing a sexy striptease for your partner. Whatever it is, keep it sexy and romantic.

 

Stress can be a big killjoy in a partnership anyway, but it can certainly spell the death of sex and romance. You’re not going to want to leap into bed the moment you get back from a stressful day at work, but give yourself chance to unwind and the concept of sex may not seem quite so bad. Spend some time with your partner and relax, before seeing where things go – if they lead to sex, great! If not, you’re at least relaxing and enjoying each others company, which is still important in keeping the romantic spark alive. Likewise, if there is stress in your relationship such as with an unresolved argument it can cause problems between you. Don’t allow your feelings to linger for days on end – talk it out with your partner, get to the bottom of what is troubling you both then move forward. Once you get back to that positive and romantic place in your relationship, you can begin to include sex as part of your weekly routine once again. It’s easy to let arguments take centre stage in your relationship, but they don’t need to. Communication really is key in these situations and once you can create an open and honest dialogue in your union, you will find that the arguments are few and far between.

Being tired is a common excuse for people not wanting to have sex but long hours at the office don’t have to mean the end of your sex life. Yes, you may want to lounge on the sofa when you get back from work, but making the effort a few times a week to spend time with your partner and ignite a little romance will have enormous payback in the form of a happy relationship and a healthy sex life. Make a deal with your partner that neither one of you attempts to initiate sex when the other is particularly stressed or tired from work – this means that on days when you’re really wiped out from work, you don’t have to worry about having an awkward exchange of views when you get back. But don’t let intimacy fall to the side either – perhaps replace sex on these occasions with a romantic night in with a nice meal.

Categories: partner, relationship, Romance, romantic relationships, sex life, sexual health, Sexual Relationships, time, work

Want To Boost Your Health? Get A Relationship!

In a recent study, researchers discovered that there is a strong link between a happy relationship and a healthy lifestyle which can help us maintain healthier lifestyle habits, avoid illness and even live longer. Various factors can influence our health, from stress levels to diet, but this new study has thrown up new information as to the importance of a strong relationship to build a stronger immunity and create a happier mental attitude. No matter whether your dating, married or living together, a happy romantic relationship can do wonders for your physical and mental health.

A happy couple, according to the study, can help to motivate each other to stay on top of their health – this can be through encouraging more exercise or simply through eating a better diet. The one aspect of your health which may not improve necessarily is your weight – studies have shown that those in relationships tend to gain weight. Regular physical intimacy can also help boost your health, through lowering stress and increasing your sense of wellbeing. Those who have sex regularly are said to be more mentally healthy and gain more satisfaction through their relationship and life in general. But that’s not all – simply sleeping next to someone you love can help you to feel more relaxed, setting you up for a better night’s sleep.

Finally, your alcohol intake could be affected by a relationship – researchers noted that romantic partners influence each other’s drinking habits, with individuals mirroring their partner’s drinking in the first four years of marriage. So if your partner drinks a lot, it’s likely that you will too. Both men and women drink as an emotional resolve to problems, so your relationship may influence how much you’re drinking. Likewise, relationships may affect your level of anxiety – studies have shown contrasting results in the effects of a relationship on anxiety levels and depression.

Categories: health, lifestyle, romantic relationships

Marriage And Sex - How Much is Normal?

When you find the person you want to spend the rest of your life with, you assume that everything will be as compatible as you are. This can hit a snag when it comes to your sex life, though, as we all have different libidos. What do you do if your partner rarely wants sex, or if they want it far more often than you do? Which is normal? The level of sex in your relationship can cause emotional difficulties and rifts between the two of you. Communication is key in these situations – if you can’t talk about this with your partner, the issue will never be resolved.

Being on different wavelengths to your partner means that what is normal, or less so, for you probably isn’t the case for your partner. In other words, what you consider to be a rarity could be constant sexual activity for them. In these situations, it’s important to take into account the differing expectations about sex – every marriage is different, so it’s about coming up with a compromise which leaves you both happy and settled. Experts believe that sex is more of an emotional experience for men than women, contrary to popular belief. Men tend to express their emotions through actions rather than words, which is where using sex as an expression of emotional attachment comes into play. So, it makes sense that they miss sex when it disappears, as it removes their primary emotional outlet.

So, how much is ‘normal’? Nearly 80 percent of married couples say they have sex a few times a month or more, with 32 percent reporting that they have sex two to three times a week. 47 percent stated that they have sex a few times a month, according to a study carried out by the University of Chicago. Researchers found that people are more able to sustain desire in their long-term relationship when they are motivated to meet their partner’s sexual needs, even if this conflicts with their own desires. This is known as sexual communal strength, with those who rate high in this being more willing to engage in sexual activity with their partner even when they aren’t interested in sex themselves.

Marriage And Sex - How Much is Normal?

Categories: Emotional Wellness, romantic relationships, Sexual Relationships