Give it a Go: 8 Sexy New Ideas for Long-Term Couples to Try

You might think you have your sexual health and wellbeing sorted. You know what you like, and you know what you don’t like, so it’s smooth sailing from here on in, right? Wrong. According to sexual wellness expert Marissa Gold, ‘There are two primary phases in most people’s sex lives—the sex you have before you get into a relationship, and the sex you have after.’ And, let’s be honest, the latter phase isn’t the one you brag about to your friends at brunch. As a long-term couple, things change and your sex life needs to change with it, or else you’ll be bored in the bedroom – and no one wants that. Improve your sex life in any relationship by giving these sex tips for couples a try.

 

1. Role-Play the Opposite of Your Personalities: ‘Is your guy a go-getter who handles everything in your relationship?’ asks Gold. ‘Tie him to the bedpost. Is he on the shy side and lets you call all the shots? Hand him some bondage tape and tell him to take over. Most people like to play a role in bed that’s not what they play in real life.’

 

2. Do That Thing He’s Always Begging You to Do: Gold points out, ‘Most men are pretty vocal about their sexual fantasies. It’s the male equivalent of our nagging them to pick up their socks. Does your guy really, really want you to dance for him? Try anal sex? Dress up like a French maid, perhaps? Since you’re the only woman he’s allowed to have sex with and all, it’s worth a try!’

 

3. Try A Position You’ve Never Done Before: Gold explains, ‘Doing new things together is a bonding experience, and let’s be honest—it’s probably been a while since either of you did something new in bed. Just throw out a sex position, or ask him if there’s one he’s never tried, and go for it. Best case? Someone loves it. Worst case? You have a good laugh.’

 

4. Leave Your Underwear at Home on Date Night: ‘OK, it’s a little cheesy,’ Gold admits. ‘But it’ll make your typical routine of sharing the burrata appetizer at your neighbourhood Italian restaurant a little more fun. As you’re leaving home, as you’re walking in, or as you’re sitting down, just let him know. And wear a body-con dress and heels so he can fantasize about the easy access.’

 

5. Have Sex When You Don’t Really Feel Like It: ‘Let me be clear,’ Gold cautions. ‘Never do anything you really don’t want to do. However, relationships are about compromise, so if you’re turning him down more than you’re turning him on, you might consider some pro bono (he-he!) sex once in a while. It will go a long way in your relationship, because once a guy feels neglected or rejected, he might stop trying to do all those things you like too.’

 

6. Treat Him Like a Sex Object Sometimes: Gold notes, ‘What kind of sex do people have during affairs? The kind of sex where clothes get ripped and lamps get broken. A lot of people crave that kind of passion, which we all know is hard to maintain when you’ve slept together literally hundreds of times. So consider it an investment in your monogamy and treat him like the jerky-but-so-hot football player you wanted just one night with in college and take the guy. He’ll like it, promise.’

 

7. Don’t Forget About Oral: Gold comments, ‘Every woman knows that men love oral sex, and every man knows that at some point in a long-term relationship, he’ll probably stop getting it. In his ideal world, you’ll keep doing it because you want to, so don’t make it seem like a chore (even if you kind of feel like is). P.S. This rule works both ways.’

 

8. Don’t Wear Frumpy Outfits to Bed Every Night: ‘To a lot of men, the moment you wear sweatpants to bed is the exact moment when the romance officially dies,’ says Gold. ‘This is hard, because you want to wear those comfy sweats as much as he wants to stop doing sit-ups every day. But consider an upgrade to lingerie (or at least retire the baggy T-shirt) every once in a while and watch the magic happen. Bonus: Not only will he love it if you’re a little sexier when you hit the sheets, you might find it puts you in the mood too.’

Categories: gold, long, Long term, nbsp, oral sex, people, positions, relationship, Role Play, sex life

How to Give Your Partner the Best Blow Job He’s Ever Had

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Categories: blow, blow job, Ejaculation, ice cream, mouth, nbsp, oral sex, partner, penis

Meet the New STD (that Looks A Lot Like the Old Ones)

You may think you’ve heard all about sexually transmitted diseases, but now a new one poses a threat to your sexual health and wellbeing, albeit looking a lot like one of the old ones. According to wellness writer Charles Bankhead, ‘Once the scourge of older patients with a history of smoking and heavy alcohol use, head and neck cancer has evolved into a disease that strikes people – mostly men – in the prime of life. The driving force behind the molecular transformation is the same one that has received so much attention for causing cervical cancer in women: human papillomavirus (HPV). What’s more, the same oncologic strains drive both types of cancer.’

 

Bankhead notes, ‘About 37,000 new cases of head and neck cancer are diagnosed each year. HPV infection accounts for about two thirds of the total, according to the CDC. The “classic” tobacco- and alcohol-related head and neck cancer tended to be oral-cavity malignancies. In HPV-positive majority, oropharyngeal cancer predominates. Many people who were unaware of the role HPV plays in head and neck cancer probably learned about it last summer when actor Michael Douglas announced publicly that his head and neck cancer was caused by HPV infection, which he attributed to oral sex…Douglas’s announcement drew public attention to what authorities in the field have known for years: Head and neck cancer is essentially an STD, or at least a manifestation of one.’

 

Anil Chaturvedi, PhD, of the National Cancer Institute, points out that the incidence of oral-cavity cancer remained stable from 1973 to 1984, and then began a decline that continues today, reflecting trends in tobacco and alcohol use. The incidence of oropharyngeal cancer, on the other hand, increased gradually until about 2000. The proportion of HPV-positive oropharyngeal tumours has increased from 16% in the late 1980s to 72% since the turn of the century. Chaturvedi explains, ‘The increase in oropharynx cancer has come exclusively from an increase in HPV-positive cancers, which increased by 225. In parallel over the same period, the incidence of HPV-negative oropharynx cancer has declined by about 50%.’

 

Bankhead points out, ‘The emergence of HPV-positive oropharyngeal cancer has been driven almost entirely by oral HPV infection, which has become incredibly common. Data from the National Health and Nutrition Evaluation Survey showed a 7% prevalence of oral HPV infection among US adults – one in 14. Oral HPV infection occurs two to five times more often in men than women…Current prevalence estimates are 10.1% among men and 3.6% among women. Infection rates in both sexes are driven predominantly by sexual activity, accounting for more than 80% of cases in women and almost 90% in men. The risk of infection increases with the number of sex partners in both men and women and with smoking, rising with the number of cigarettes smoked.’

 

Amber D’Souza, PhD, of Johns Hopkins School of Public Health, admits, ‘It’s been hard to say which [sexual] behaviours transmit the infection. We know that it can be transmitted by oral sex. We know that performing oral sex on a woman increases the risk of acquiring HPV infection and that performing oral sex on a woman appears to have a higher risk of infection than performing oral sex on a man…It is a sexually transmitted infection. It is not casually transmitted.’ She adds that three-quarters of infected individuals clear the infection within two years. ‘Then there’s this subgroup of people who have persistent infection,’ she says. ‘We still think most of them will not develop HPV-positive oropharyngeal cancer.’ As many as 85% of patients survive without recurrence or with effective treatment at recurrence. However, that leaves 15% who don’t do so well, and the reasons remain a mystery.

Categories: head and neck cancer, HPV, hpv infection, hpv positive, neck cancer, oral cavity, oral hpv, oral sex, Oropharyngeal Cancer, performing oral, positive oropharyngeal

Better Health and Better Sex: Date a Vegetarian

There are lots of good reasons to date a vegetarian, but did you know that your sexual wellness and wellbeing could benefit from this choice too?

 

A recent survey showed that 30 percent of omnivores would not consider dating a vegetarian, but there are actually lots of great reasons to date a herbivore, including a better sex life, better health and better moods.

 

Vegetarians are great in bed. A study recently published in the journal Hormones and Behaviour has shown that there is a link between a vegetarian diet and increased sexual activity. It is thought that this is because certain plants produce so-called sex hormones called phytoestrogens, which could have an influence on the sex lives of humans.

 

The same study also proved that vegetarians are more likely to give oral sex than non vegetarians. The survey was done on both men and women, and showed that 9:1 liked giving oral sex, as opposed to 7:1 non vegetarians.

 

The vegetarian diet has also been linked with virility.

 

Vegetarians are also far less likely to develop various health problems such as cancer, heart disease and cognitive decline. A magazine also shows that a meat-free diet is far more healthy than a meat-based diet. Vegetarians consume no animal fat and less cholesterol and tend to consume more antioxidant-rich produce and fibre.

 

Another study showed that vegetarians tend to be healthier than those who eat meat. Eating more fruit and veg has been shown to improve people’s mood. A clinical trial carried out on 300 people showed that increasing their intake of any kind of plant-based produce led to a far greater feeling of happiness and calm.

 

Another study also showed that omnivores improved their mood when they restricted their intake of meat and increased their intake of fruit and veg.

Categories: health, meat, nbsp, nbsp vegetarians, oral sex, Sex, study, Vegetarian, vegetarian diet, Vegetarians

7 Dangerous Myths Surrounding Sexually Transmitted Diseases

You learn about sexually transmitted diseases (STDs) from a variety of sources; in sex education lessons, by word of mouth and from your friends. However, this wide range of fonts of information can potentially be damaging to your wellbeing; exposing you to a multitude of myths and urban legends surrounding in STDs. If you believe in such legends, you may be putting your sexual wellness at risk! To keep you and your partner safe and healthy in and outside the bedroom, we asked sexual health expert Lizette Borreli to debunk seven commonly-believed STD myths.

 

1. You Can’t Get an STD from Oral Sex: According to Borreli, ‘This myth is uttered by many teens, but it is 100% untrue. Unprotected oral sex — “blow jobs” or “going downtown” and whether you do it or it’s done to you, puts you at risk for an STD…If the partner is giving oral sex to a man, the risk increases if they have any cuts or scrapes in his or her mouth. These scrapes may include small ones caused by brushing or flossing before sex. Giving oral sex to a woman can increase the risk of infection if there is menstrual blood, if the woman has another STD in addition to HIV, or if the person performing oral sex has sores or cuts in his or her mouth.’

 

2. Pulling Out Prevents Pregnancy and STDs: ‘Better use protection,’ asserts Borreli. ‘The withdrawal or “pulling out” method does not prevent HIV or other STDs. Most disease-causing microorganisms are not contingent on ejaculation for transmission. This method is less effective at preventing pregnancy compared to condoms, the Pill, or shot.’

 

3. Birth Control Users Don’t Need to Worry About STDs: Borreli comments, ‘Birth control methods such as the pill are very effective at preventing pregnancy, but they do not protect against STDs. Condoms are the only method of protection against both STDs and pregnancy, says the Food and Drug Administration. Using a condom and also a birth control method like the pill will provide maximum protection for both partners.’

 

4. Douching After Sex or Having Sex in a Pool will Prevent STDs: ‘You’re still at risk,’ Borreli warns. ‘This classic urban legend has gained popularity under the belief that chlorine is a disinfectant that kills STD-causing bacteria or viruses. Chlorine is not a condom, and it will not kill sperm. If partners desire to have sex in a pool or hot tub, take extra precaution because latex condoms can easily break down in hot water temperatures.’

 

5. You Can Only Catch Herpes if Your Partner Has a Visible Outbreak: Borreli cautions, ‘Most people have no or few symptoms from a herpes infection. The majority of people with herpes are not aware that they have it, but symptoms such as itching or a burning feeling in the genital or anal area, swollen glands, or vaginal discharge, can last from two to three weeks. They commonly cause infections of the mouth and lips, also known as “fever blisters.”’

 

6. You Only Get STDs from Semen: ‘Think again,’ says Borreli. ‘Although semen and blood can spread STDs, some like herpes and syphilis can be transmitted by skin on skin contact. If a partner has herpes and experiences visible “fever blisters,” the sore can spread when it comes into contact with someone’s skin in areas like the mouth, throat, and cuts or rashes. A partner may become infected even before blisters begin to form.’

 

7. Lesbians Don’t Need to Worry About STDs: Borreli points out, ‘Women who have sex with other women may rarely get HIV, but the risk increases if a woman has sex with an HIV-positive woman, or injects drugs or has sex with a man who has HIV…This could happen because soft tissues, like those in the mouth, can come into contact with the vaginal fluid or menstrual blood of the woman infected with HIV. Women can spread a number of STDs to one another during oral sex, manual sex, or frottage.’

Categories: Birth Control, fever blisters, giving oral, menstrual blood, Myths, oral sex, preventing pregnancy, risk increases, sexually transmitted, sexually transmitted infections, stds borreli

Five STDs that Are Easily Transmitted During Oral Sex

You probably think you’re pretty well-educated about sexual health. You know you need to protect your wellbeing against STDs by using a condom during sex, but what about the risks of oral sex? Let’s take a look at which STDs threaten your wellness during oral sex, and what you can do to prevent this.

 

1. Herpes: According to sexual health and wellness writer Amanda King, herpes ‘is the most commonly transmitted STD through oral sex. There are two types of herpes simplex virus (HSV) infection: HSV 1, which causes sores around the mouth, and HSV 2 which is responsible for genital sores. It is possible for a person with HSV 1 to transmit the virus and cause genital sores on the receiving partner. It is also possible, although rare, for HSV 2 to be transmitted from genital to mouth contact, causing mouth sores. It is possible to transmit and catch herpes even during times when there are no symptoms. Certain medications, such as Zovirax, and the use of condoms or dental dams can help to lessen the chance of transmission, but won’t eliminate it entirely.

 

2. HPV (human papillomavirus): ‘Also referred to as genital warts, HPV can also be transmitted via oral sex,’ says Davies. ‘In fact, HPV acquired through oral sex is believed to be a main cause of throat cancer. Condoms and dental dams are effective in reducing the transmission rate of HPV through oral sex, but they do not prevent it, entirely, since, like with herpes, the disease is spread through skin to skin contact, rather than through bodily fluids. HPV presents as small, hard, generally painless white bumps on the genitalia and is a major cause of cancer in women.’

 

3. Gonorrhoea: Davies notes, ‘Sometimes called “The Clap,” gonorrhoea is very easily transmitted through oral sex, most often causing throat infections, which are difficult to treat, but usually resolve in a matter of three to four months. It is less likely to be transmitted from a female to a partner, since the site of infection is at the cervix, which doesn’t come into play during cunnilingus. Oral gonorrhoea can produce a sore throat, difficulty swallowing, red spots and white/yellow discharge. Oral gonorrhoea can also be transmitted to another person through oral sex, manifesting as an infection of the genitals. Gonorrhoea is treated with antibiotics, but in recent years, antibiotic resistant strains of the disease have been emerging, making it difficult to treat. Left untreated, gonorrhoea can cause, pelvic inflammatory disease (PID) and epididymitis in men, which can both lead to infertility.’

 

4. Chlamydia: Davies comments that chlamydia ‘is transmitted similarly to gonorrhoea, being more common during fellatio, and with low female to partner transmission rates. The symptoms of a chlamydia throat infection are similar to a sore throat because of a cold. Dry, scratchy throat and painful swallowing are common. The symptoms of a genital infection are burning during urination, pain during sex (for women), testicular pain, rectal pain and discharge, discharge from the penis or vagina. Like gonorrhoea, it is treated with antibiotics.’

 

5. Syphilis: This STD ‘extremely transmittable via oral sex,’ warns Davies. ‘It is only contagious during symptomatic phases, however, in some phases of the disease, the painless sores are easy to overlook. The symptoms include sores, skin rash and lesions on the palms of the hands and soles of the feet, fever, swollen lymph nodes, hair loss, headaches, weight loss and exhaustion. Left untreated, syphilis can damage internal organs, including the brain. Late stage syphilis causes blindness, paralysis, trouble coordinating muscle movements and even death.  It is also treated with antibiotics.’

Categories: dental dams, easily transmitted, genital sores, Herpes, left untreated, oral, oral gonorrhoea, oral sex, sexual health, sore throat, Syphilis

Blow Him Away: How to Give Your Partner Amazing Oral Sex

Oral sex can be seen as somewhat of a chore by both men and women. Men aren’t really into foreplay – unless they’re on the receiving end – and women often fear the daunting task of a “blow job.” However, oral sex can be a wonderful part of your sexual health and wellbeing. If done right, it can be satisfying for both of you, so stop thinking of it as a “job” and take up these hot tips for blowing your partner away.

 

1. Take Control: According to Mark Michaels and Patricia Johnson, authors of Bedded Bliss, oral sex ‘can be one of the most empowering things to do because you’re taking charge of his pleasure. That can amp up your own arousal.’ You also have the opportunity to be adventurous, playful and fun. Wellness writer Anna Davies instructs, ‘Do what feels best for you—and by all means request that he return the favour. Once you’re ready, start slowly and maintain eye contact as you begin to move your hand up and down his shaft. If you’d like, prep the area by adding a bit of flavoured lube that’s safe for consumption, like Babeland’s Babelicious line, which can make the act a little more palatable and help any initial hand actions go more smoothly.’

 

2. Linger: Davies notes, ‘Nothing about a blowjob should be fast—he wants to savour it, and you’ll love making him squirm. So start slow by grazing your mouth against his penis as you continue moving your hand up and down his lubricated shaft. One more thing: At this point, it’s all right if he’s not entirely erect. In fact, it’s normal for his erection to ebb and flow during oral sex, and it’s not indicative of his pleasure.’

 

3. Ask About It: California-based sexologist Amy Marsh points out that asking him to tell you when a move really turns him on adds to the mood, and will make it even better next time. ‘Being honest about how it feels will boost enjoyment on both sides,’ says Marsh.

 

4. Take It an Inch at a Time: Marsh warns, ‘Gagging takes you both out of the moment, and you and he will enjoy oral sex much more when you’re both having fun.’ Davies outlines, ‘To simulate deep throating, you want to use some combination of your mouth, tongue and hands…Move your mouth and hand in a rhythmic motion. Always let him know what you don’t like when you’re going down on him, whether it be holding your head or thrusting strongly.’

 

5. Take a Lipstick Break: ‘Awkward angles and jaw pain can make it hard to enjoy oral sex, so take some breaks,’ Davies advises. ‘You could try the “lipstick technique” for a bit: Use your hand to brush the head of his penis against the outline of your lips, taking the head in your mouth between outlines for added lubrication.’

 

6. Focus on the Frenulum: There’s a bundle of nerves in the frenulum, so flick it with the tip of your tongue. Davies recommends, ‘Circle the head of the penis slowly, stopping each time you hit this pleasure spot.’

 

7. Lick It: Davies explains, ‘Licking his penis like you’re licking an ice cream cone is a guy-pleaser for a reason: Not only does a regular rhythm help get him even more worked up, but it gives you a chance to get into a groove.’ Marsh adds, ‘Creating a steady rhythm is what builds and sustains excitement.’

 

8. Commit: Michaels and Johnson note, ‘Conveying your genuine enthusiasm is the biggest turn-on. The more pleasure you feel, and the more you can get across that you’re enjoying the act, the more pleasure your partner will receive in turn.’

Categories: control, davies, frenulum, hand, nbsp, oral, oral sex, pleasure

Blow Him Away: How to Give Your Partner Amazing Oral Sex

Oral sex can be seen as somewhat of a chore by both men and women. Men aren’t really into foreplay – unless they’re on the receiving end – and women often fear the daunting task of a “blow job.” However, oral sex can be a wonderful part of your sexual health and wellbeing. If done right, it can be satisfying for both of you, so stop thinking of it as a “job” and take up these hot tips for blowing your partner away.

 

1. Take Control: According to Mark Michaels and Patricia Johnson, authors of Bedded Bliss, oral sex ‘can be one of the most empowering things to do because you’re taking charge of his pleasure. That can amp up your own arousal.’ You also have the opportunity to be adventurous, playful and fun. Wellness writer Anna Davies instructs, ‘Do what feels best for you—and by all means request that he return the favour. Once you’re ready, start slowly and maintain eye contact as you begin to move your hand up and down his shaft. If you’d like, prep the area by adding a bit of flavoured lube that’s safe for consumption, like Babeland’s Babelicious line, which can make the act a little more palatable and help any initial hand actions go more smoothly.’

 

2. Linger: Davies notes, ‘Nothing about a blowjob should be fast—he wants to savour it, and you’ll love making him squirm. So start slow by grazing your mouth against his penis as you continue moving your hand up and down his lubricated shaft. One more thing: At this point, it’s all right if he’s not entirely erect. In fact, it’s normal for his erection to ebb and flow during oral sex, and it’s not indicative of his pleasure.’

 

3. Ask About It: California-based sexologist Amy Marsh points out that asking him to tell you when a move really turns him on adds to the mood, and will make it even better next time. ‘Being honest about how it feels will boost enjoyment on both sides,’ says Marsh.

 

4. Take It an Inch at a Time: Marsh warns, ‘Gagging takes you both out of the moment, and you and he will enjoy oral sex much more when you’re both having fun.’ Davies outlines, ‘To simulate deep throating, you want to use some combination of your mouth, tongue and hands…Move your mouth and hand in a rhythmic motion. Always let him know what you don’t like when you’re going down on him, whether it be holding your head or thrusting strongly.’

 

5. Take a Lipstick Break: ‘Awkward angles and jaw pain can make it hard to enjoy oral sex, so take some breaks,’ Davies advises. ‘You could try the “lipstick technique” for a bit: Use your hand to brush the head of his penis against the outline of your lips, taking the head in your mouth between outlines for added lubrication.’

 

6. Focus on the Frenulum: There’s a bundle of nerves in the frenulum, so flick it with the tip of your tongue. Davies recommends, ‘Circle the head of the penis slowly, stopping each time you hit this pleasure spot.’

 

7. Lick It: Davies explains, ‘Licking his penis like you’re licking an ice cream cone is a guy-pleaser for a reason: Not only does a regular rhythm help get him even more worked up, but it gives you a chance to get into a groove.’ Marsh adds, ‘Creating a steady rhythm is what builds and sustains excitement.’

 

8. Commit: Michaels and Johnson note, ‘Conveying your genuine enthusiasm is the biggest turn-on. The more pleasure you feel, and the more you can get across that you’re enjoying the act, the more pleasure your partner will receive in turn.’

Categories: control, davies, frenulum, hand, nbsp, oral, oral sex, pleasure

10 Sexually Transmitted Infections You Need to Spot

Sexually transmitted infections (STIs) can really take their toll on your sexual health, but how do you know which is which? We’ve rounded up the main STIs that may threaten your wellbeing – could you spot them all if you needed to?

 

1. Chlamydia: This is a bacterial infection that affects the wellness of your genital tract. Award-winning wellness writer Hope Gillette notes, ‘Chlamydia in its early stages is often without symptoms. According to the Mayo Clinic, when symptoms do manifest they appear one to three weeks after infection and include painful urination, vaginal discharge, abdominal pain, discharge from the penis, and painful intercourse…It is transmitted primarily through vaginal intercourse though rarely it can also be transmitted through oral sex and from mother to child.’

 

2. Pubic lice: Also known as crabs, these small parasites can live in your pubic hair, armpits, eyelashes and facial hair. According to Gillette, ‘Anyone can get pubic lice, and sexual contact is not necessarily required. Contact with infested bed sheets and clothing can also spread the parasite. Pubic lice do not usually cause significant health issues though a secondary infection may occur from excessive itching of the area.’

 

3. Gonorrhea: Gillette details, ‘Symptoms generally occur around 10 days after exposure and include discharge from the vagina or penis, burning sensation while urinating, swollen testicles, abnormal menstrual bleeding, anal itching, and painful bowel movements. Symptoms are more common in men than in women.’

 

4. Herpes: ‘It is possible for someone with oral herpes to give a partner genital herpes through oral sex (and vice versa),’ Gillette warns. ‘Although most of the time genital herpes is caused by HSV-2 after anal or vaginal sex. Symptoms are usually mild and can go unrecognized; approximately 90% of people with herpes do not know they have the virus. The most common symptom is the appearance of small sores in the genital area.’

 

5. Hepatitis: Gillette explains, ‘Each hepatitis virus spreads in different manners; however, all forms can be spread through sexual contact…All forms of hepatitis damage the liver, and while many cases offer no major health complications, some can lead to liver failure and death. Symptoms vary and can manifest as innocently as fatigue or progress to serious illness and mental confusion.’

 

6. HIV/AIDS: ‘HIV, the human immunodeficiency virus, is the virus that causes AIDS,’ Gillette comments. ‘This STD can be transmitted through contact with infected blood, sexual secretions and breast milk. Many people do not know they are infected with HIV, as the vast majority only experience mild flu-like symptoms approximately two weeks after infection.’

 

7. HPV: ‘The human papilloma virus (HPV) is one of the STDs that can cause serious negative health effects down the road,’ says Gillette. ‘It is the leading cause of cervical cancer for women and the virus responsible for genital warts…HPV is spread through skin-to-skin contact, not just through contact with sexual organs or secretions. In some people, HPV never presents symptoms, and those people can go on to infect others unknowingly.’

 

8. Syphilis: Gillette points out, ‘Syphilis is curable, though if left untreated it can cause severe organ damage over time…Symptoms of syphilis vary depending on the stage of infection but include a single sore, a rash of the palms of the hands or on the feet, or white sores around the mouth or genital area.’

 

9. Trichomoniasis: ‘Most men with trich remain asymptomatic, but women can experience painful urination, strong vaginal odor, discharge from the vagina, pain during sex, and itching or irritation of the genital area,’ Gillette asserts. ‘Trich can cause low birth weight in babies and can also make an individual more susceptible to HIV infection.’

 

10. Molluscum contagiosum: Gillette details, ‘It is a benign infection and usually resolves on its own, but symptoms include skin lesions in the genital and rectal area which last from two weeks to four years.’

Categories: area nbsp, genital area, gillette details, Herpes, HIV, infection nbsp, oral sex, painful urination, Pubic Lice, sexual contact, sexually transmitted infections, transmitted infections

10 Sexually Transmitted Infections You Need to Spot

Sexually transmitted infections (STIs) can really take their toll on your sexual health, but how do you know which is which? We’ve rounded up the main STIs that may threaten your wellbeing – could you spot them all if you needed to?

 

1. Chlamydia: This is a bacterial infection that affects the wellness of your genital tract. Award-winning wellness writer Hope Gillette notes, ‘Chlamydia in its early stages is often without symptoms. According to the Mayo Clinic, when symptoms do manifest they appear one to three weeks after infection and include painful urination, vaginal discharge, abdominal pain, discharge from the penis, and painful intercourse…It is transmitted primarily through vaginal intercourse though rarely it can also be transmitted through oral sex and from mother to child.’

 

2. Pubic lice: Also known as crabs, these small parasites can live in your pubic hair, armpits, eyelashes and facial hair. According to Gillette, ‘Anyone can get pubic lice, and sexual contact is not necessarily required. Contact with infested bed sheets and clothing can also spread the parasite. Pubic lice do not usually cause significant health issues though a secondary infection may occur from excessive itching of the area.’

 

3. Gonorrhea: Gillette details, ‘Symptoms generally occur around 10 days after exposure and include discharge from the vagina or penis, burning sensation while urinating, swollen testicles, abnormal menstrual bleeding, anal itching, and painful bowel movements. Symptoms are more common in men than in women.’

 

4. Herpes: ‘It is possible for someone with oral herpes to give a partner genital herpes through oral sex (and vice versa),’ Gillette warns. ‘Although most of the time genital herpes is caused by HSV-2 after anal or vaginal sex. Symptoms are usually mild and can go unrecognized; approximately 90% of people with herpes do not know they have the virus. The most common symptom is the appearance of small sores in the genital area.’

 

5. Hepatitis: Gillette explains, ‘Each hepatitis virus spreads in different manners; however, all forms can be spread through sexual contact…All forms of hepatitis damage the liver, and while many cases offer no major health complications, some can lead to liver failure and death. Symptoms vary and can manifest as innocently as fatigue or progress to serious illness and mental confusion.’

 

6. HIV/AIDS: ‘HIV, the human immunodeficiency virus, is the virus that causes AIDS,’ Gillette comments. ‘This STD can be transmitted through contact with infected blood, sexual secretions and breast milk. Many people do not know they are infected with HIV, as the vast majority only experience mild flu-like symptoms approximately two weeks after infection.’

 

7. HPV: ‘The human papilloma virus (HPV) is one of the STDs that can cause serious negative health effects down the road,’ says Gillette. ‘It is the leading cause of cervical cancer for women and the virus responsible for genital warts…HPV is spread through skin-to-skin contact, not just through contact with sexual organs or secretions. In some people, HPV never presents symptoms, and those people can go on to infect others unknowingly.’

 

8. Syphilis: Gillette points out, ‘Syphilis is curable, though if left untreated it can cause severe organ damage over time…Symptoms of syphilis vary depending on the stage of infection but include a single sore, a rash of the palms of the hands or on the feet, or white sores around the mouth or genital area.’

 

9. Trichomoniasis: ‘Most men with trich remain asymptomatic, but women can experience painful urination, strong vaginal odor, discharge from the vagina, pain during sex, and itching or irritation of the genital area,’ Gillette asserts. ‘Trich can cause low birth weight in babies and can also make an individual more susceptible to HIV infection.’

 

10. Molluscum contagiosum: Gillette details, ‘It is a benign infection and usually resolves on its own, but symptoms include skin lesions in the genital and rectal area which last from two weeks to four years.’

Categories: area nbsp, genital area, gillette details, Herpes, HIV, infection nbsp, oral sex, painful urination, Pubic Lice, sexual contact, sexually transmitted infections, transmitted infections

Blowjob Skills To Improve Your Oral Sex Technique

Oral sex is something of a regular addition to the majority of couples’ sex routines these days, but despite blowjobs being a regular feature in the sexual activities of modern-day couples, many women don’t actually know if what they’re doing ‘down there’ is right. And men often aren’t sure whether women like giving head or if it’s something they do to please their partner. So how do you give mind-blowing oral sex?

Previous surveys indicate that around 55 per cent of women find oral sex to be perfectly normal and were happy to include it into their sexual routine, and many women also do it as part of reciprocity too! Blowjobs have been around for centuries and certainly aren’t a new sex technique, despite them becoming increasingly popular since the 90s. Some women worry about getting a sore jaw from keeping their mouth locked in the same position for too long, but there isn’t a set position to put yourself in to limit this happening – you simply have to alternate between sucking and licking to give your jaw a break from staying in the same position too long, if you find that this becomes a problem. It’s natural for your hands, as a man, to land on a woman’s head while she’s giving you a blowjob, but most women don’t enjoy you pushing on their head – a little gentle hair stroking is fine, but don’t get too forceful. Another big no-no is pushing a woman’s head down if you’re kissing her or are in the mood – it’s off-putting and demeaning, and certainly doesn’t put your partner in the mood for oral sex! As with anything in the bedroom, asking or suggesting is the best way to go – you don’t want your partner to feel forced into something they don’t want to do.

 

Blowjobs are something that many people feel worried or anxious about, but there isn’t any need to be nervous about going down on your partner. As with hand jobs, it’s a personal thing as to how hard or fast you go while you’re down there. So communication is key; take some time out to talk to your partner and see what he likes. There may be a particular technique he enjoys that you can learn how to do. And don’t be afraid of mixing things up and keeping your blowjobs interesting. You can use flavoured lubes, use your hands as a chaser to your mouth and tongue, or trying experimenting with temperatures by sucking on an ice cube before going down on him, then drinking a hot drink and doing the same to keep him guessing what’s coming. Experimenting is all part of the fun though, so keep it fun and light-hearted to see what you both enjoy, both as the giver and the receiver. As with anything in sex though, you should practice your technique. Don’t suck too hard and be sure to mix things up with your tongue, such as licking and swirling your tongue around the tip of the penis.

 

If you’re nervous about blowjobs, you can always start off slow and build up to more experimentation when you feel a bit more confident. The most important things to remember are not to go too hard and to avoid using your teeth, as this isn’t usually well received! Blowjobs aren’t as scary as they first seem and with a little practice, you can become an oral sex pro in no time.

Categories: blowjobs, head, oral, oral sex, partner, Sex, sex technique, technique, Women, women don

Fuse Blower: How to Get the Orgasm You’re After

The problem with female sexual health and wellness is that even the smallest thing can set you off course. As Nicole Beland, author of Sex, The Whole Picture: The Ultimate How-To for Lovers, details, ‘When I’m this close to orgasm—eyes squeezed shut, lips twisted in a Billy Idol sneer, cheeks glowing—the most descriptive word wouldn’t be “passionate” or “erotic.” It would be “determined.” Because right then, at the edges of my fading consciousness, I’m worried that the phone will ring, my knees will lose their traction on the sheets, or my boyfriend will change position, and suddenly I’ll be sliding away from that elusive peak instead of moving toward it. For the 75% of women who don’t always reach orgasm during intercourse, this happens all the time.’

 

What you need is a fuse blower, or a last shot of stimulation to send you over the edge. According to sex therapist Ian Kerner, PhD, author of She Comes First, ‘Calling it a fuse blower is pretty appropriate. Recent studies show that in order for a woman to achieve orgasm, the part of her brain associated with stress, emotion, and anxiety has to shut down.’ If your partner is able to do something that makes you feel so good that you relax and let go, it’s very likely that you will reach that all-important climax. So, take a look at Beland’s list of orgasm triggers, share them with your partner, and get him to try one out once you reach the point at which you’re sweaty and breathing fast.

 

1. The Double Grip: ‘Despite all the attention her booty may attract when she’s walking down the street in tight jeans or bending over a file cabinet, a woman’s butt is too often sidelined during sex,’ says Beland. ‘And that’s why grabbing both of her cheeks when she’s on top may be just the unexpected turn-on a girl needs to get off.’ New York sex therapist Gilda Carle, PhD, explains, ‘The buttocks are packed with nerve endings. To give her a surprising jolt of pleasure, spread your fingers wide and squeeze both buttocks firmly.’ However, before you give your partner a good spanking, just make sure you have a conversation about it first!

 

2. The Up Shift: Beland provides the following tip courtesy of her friend Rachel: ‘When a guy is on top of you in the missionary position, have him shift his body slightly forward so that, every time he thrusts, his penis rubs against your clitoris.’ However, you can make this tactic even more orgasmic if your legs are together and your man is straddling you. Ellen Friedrichs, MA, an adjunct professor of human sexuality at RutgersUniversity, notes that this variation ‘increases clitoral stimulation.’ Or, if he’s on top, get your partner to prop himself up on his elbows so that his abdomen is in closer contact with your sweet spot.

 

3. The Ultimate: If in doubt, try foreplay, recommends Kerner: ‘Going down on a woman allows [men] to get a real sense of the stimulation she likes at every stage of arousal, especially the final one.’ Getting off when he’s going down also eliminates any performance anxiety you might have during intercourse, so you can potentially get more bang for your buck (pun intended). To get the experience you need, have your partner take note of Beland’s instructions. ‘Learn what she likes,’ she asserts. ‘Get between her legs and give her a solid base of lips, tongue, gums, and even chin to rub against. At first, use your hands to guide her hips to let her know you want her to do the grinding. When she takes over, note how hard she’s pushing and in what direction. Use that information later when using your fingers or giving her a more aggressive tongue bath.’

Categories: beland, clitoral stimulation, female orgasm, fuse blower, nbsp, oral sex, orgasm, partner, reach, sex therapist

How to Have a Great Sex Life When You’re Over 60

It may surprise younger people to learn this, but sexual wellness and wellbeing can be just as strong in the over 60s as in the under 30s. There is no rule that says that when you get to a certain age you have to stop having sex, and recent research has even found that those who are over the age of 65 may be having far more sex than anyone realises.

 

A study, published recently, found that more than a quarter of those who were over the age of 70 reported that they had had sex in the past year, and – perhaps even more surprisingly for that generation – more than half of people aged between 57 and 75 said that they had either given or received oral sex recently. In addition to this, around a third of 75 – 85 year olds had given or received oral sex in the past year.

 

It is true that sexual activity does tend to diminish as people get older, but this is not due to a decrease in sexual desire. It is mostly due to health issues that occur as people get older, which can result in couples being less sexually active than they used to be.

 

Even in this day and age, when attitudes towards sex can seem somewhat flippant, talking about sexual habits is still considered a taboo subject. This is even more the case with older generations, who are so used to not talking about the subject. Many people over a certain age will not even consider talking to their spouses about sexual problems, let alone a doctor.

 

This is part of the reason that many seniors who struggle with sexual problems end up suffering from social withdrawal and depression, because they are unable to talk about it. Others may find that a doctor could change a medication if it is causing serious sexual side effects.

Categories: nbsp, oral sex, over 60, people, received oral, seniors, Sex, sexual, sexual problems, talking, year

Staying Safe With Different Types Of Sex

Practicing safe sex is important – this might seem like an obvious statement but while many people agree that they should be practicing safe sex, many simply don’t and others aren’t too sure on what safe sex consists of and how to do it right. Sex should be a happy and fun experience that you enjoy and get excited about, it is one of the major joys of a relationship. And remember that it is always important to keeps things fresh and interesting in the bedroom, as well as practicing the safe principles you need to ensure that you can be healthy as you get older.

 

It’s a good idea to have a good knowledge of the different types of sex that are available and know the safe ways to practice them. You can then talk to your partner about these forms of sex and see if they are interested in trying something new. This can save many potentially embarrassing situations from occurring. It is best that you both feel comfortable with trying new things out and ultimately knowing that your partner is happy with what you are doing and enjoying it too puts you in a very good position and can be a turn-on of its own.

 

So here is our guide to the different types of sex and the best ways to perform it safely. If it is something you are interesting in bringing into your bedroom then this will be very helpful for you as it contains both the best ways to enjoy these forms of sex and gives you all of the knowledge you will need when you talk to your partner about it.

 

The first type of sex we are going to discuss is anal sex. Anal sex is considered to be a high risk sexual activity for a number of reasons. During anal sex it is much easier for bacteria and viruses to enter the system than other types of sex. This is especially true if you are the receiving partner of anal sex. The inside of the anus is very thin and that means that it is very easy for any viruses or infections to pass through it and get directly into the bloodstream. All sorts of sexually transmitted infections (STIs) can be present both in semen and on the inside of the anus, so protecting yourself is completely vital. Remember that you should always use a condom and that you should change condoms when switching between vaginal, anal and oral sex.

 

Another type of sex to look at is group sex. Group sex involves three or more people having sexual intercourse together and it comes with a huge number of other risks and potential problems. You should be sure to limit the group sizes to as small as possible to ensure that the risks are minimised. But even still it is key to remember that this is risky business, both physically and emotionally. Talk through ground rules and ensure that everything who is having sex knows what the limits are.

 

Finally let’s look at oral sex, which brings in a number of complications of its own. Oral sex is one of the most common kinds of sex that is performed unprotected. This is due to the fact that there is no risk of pregnancy. Nevertheless, performing unprotected oral sex puts you at a much greater risk of infections and viruses. Be sure to use a condom or dental dam if you are going to have oral sex as this ensures you are protected from STIs.

Categories: anal, anal sex, different types, group sex, nbsp, oral, oral sex, practicing safe, Safe, safe sex

The Facts Surrounding Sex After a Baby is Born

After going through childbirth many women find that they don’t feel the need or urge to have sex for a little while. Perhaps this is not surprising, after all the act of giving birth and indeed the nine months of pregnancy have meant drastic changes in the body and a new mother may still be getting used to her body. Of course once there is an awkwardness surrounding sex for a couple after the birth of the baby this can only serve to make the matter more complex. But a new study shedding more light on the issue has revealed some of the facts behind sex after childbirth.

 

Some women go for a long time without wanting to have sex while for others the process is a fairly quick and simple one. There is no right answer; it is just whatever feels right for you. But this new research has shown that much of the desire to have sex for women after childbirth comes not from physical factors, but from psychological ones. Indeed it seems that factors such as spousal support and the new baby’s sleeping habits play a far more integral role in the sex life of new parents than physical issues such as birth trauma. Doctors tend to recommend a sex-week waiting period before having sex after childbirth due to the damaging nature of giving birth, but many women find that feelings of sexual desire return long before then.

 

“One interesting thing is that women performed oral sex on their partners and engaged in masturbation earlier than they received oral sex or engaged in intercourse,” said Sari van Anders, who is a behavioural endocrinologist at the University of Michigan and one of the key figures in the study. “People have frequently assumed that women just aren’t interested in sexuality early in the postpartum period and that the sexual activity they do engage in is for the sake of their partners, but the rates of masturbation suggest that many women are feeling sexual”. This definitely suggests that it is not so much an issue of women not wanting to have sex, but rather than they do want to, but are following the advice of their doctor.

 

We all know that the period straight after having a baby can be very stressful and difficult for parents. This specifically includes periods of very little sleep which can have a very series knock-on effect on the lifestyle of the parents and can cause other problems. Lack of sleep is known to lead to irritability and a number of other problems. This is thought to be one of the key factor in why couples don’t have sex rather than being anything to do with the women not wanting to have sex – with the baby waking so often and needing constant attention it can be very difficult to find the time to be intimate. But many people instead blame this lack of intimacy on the actual effects of childbirth itself, but this is generally not the case.

 

Interestingly there was still some suggestion in the study that many women feel the need to resume sexual activity early to benefit their partners’ needs and desires. But the women’s level of social support and physical and psychological experiences during childbirth were other major factors in determining how long they took to resume sexual activity. Previously it had been thought that physical problems such as fatigue and trauma might be the major factors in determining when women want to have sex again, but it appears that this is not actually the case.

Categories: Baby, childbirth, giving birth, major factors, oral sex, resume sexual, Sex, sexual activity, surrounding sex, Women

How Oral Sex Can Cause Cancer In Men

When Michael Douglas announced that he had throat cancer, it came as something of a surprise that he thought there was only one culprit: oral sex. While it might seem at first that Michael Douglas was a delusional man, it become clear that what he saying was actually guided by genuine science. While he later stated that the cancer he had was tongue cancer rather than throat cancer, the point still stands that the evidence is now mounting up that giving oral sex leads to a number of different cancers in men.

There has been a huge spike in the number of head and neck cancers that have been linked to HPV over the past twenty years. It is beginning to raise alarm bells that we may need to worry about the risk of sexually transmitted infections and their potential ability to cause cancer in men. Indeed, according to a new study in the Journal of Clinical Oncology, between the years of 1988 and 2004, head, neck and throat cancers that tested positive for the human papilloma virus were seen to rise an astonishing 225 per cent. This is very worrying news indeed as it seems these levels of cancer are likely to continue to rise.

In fact the authors of the study go so far to argue that within the next decade the number of incidents of such cancers will overtake that of cervical cancer. It’s also true that the majority of those cases are going to be in men and will be caused by giving oral sex.  This is a point that is often missed in public talk about the HPV infection. And also remember that there is a vaccine that can prevent it.

There has been recent controversy over comments that were made by the presidential candidate Michele Bachmann about the HPV vaccine, the major aspect was squarely on young women and cervical cancer. But HPV, and specifically usually a strain called HPV-16, also causes oropharyngeal and anal cancer. This is a fact that is not often reported in the media because medical organizations, the government and academics do not want to get themselves locked into a debate about peoples sexual practices.

Until very recently, cancers of the head and neck were usually diagnosed in older people – in this instance, those with an average age of 60. Those types of cancer were usually caused by smoking or drinking too much alcohol. These types of exposures are likely to take around 20 years or more to cause the disease to occur. And, they typically didn’t test positive for HPV markers. In fact, the incident of HPV-negative head and neck cancers declined by more than 50 percent during the 16-year study period, mostly due to declines in smoking and other forms of tobacco use.

But it now seems that we are seeing the average age of head and neck cancer patients drop as increasingly younger people are beginning to develop HPV-caused cancers resulting from sexual exposure. Oral sex is thought to be one of the serious primary causes of this. Unfortunately one of the solid facts of the problem is that the best way to prevent the spread of HPV-caused cancer is to avoid the kind of practices that put you at risk. These are namely oral and anal sex – and to try to tell people that they can’t have sex in a certain kind of way would be an extremely unpopular move given how these are very mainstream forms of sexual contact. It will be interesting to see if further ideas are produced.

Categories: average age, cancer, cervical cancer, giving oral, HPV, hpv caused, michael douglas, neck cancers, oral sex, throat cancer

Warning: Having Oral Sex Could Give You Mouth Cancer

In a controversial television interview, actor Michael Douglas recently explained that his throat cancer had actually been caused by a sexual health problem.  He claimed that having oral sex with his wife had caused him to contract the human papillomavirus (HPV) which caused his head and neck cancer.

 

So, is oral sex always a threat to your wellness and wellbeing? Experts claim that this is simply not the case and that the reports that are around at the moment are causing people an unnecessary level of worry.

 

Some have proposed that a change in sexual behaviour should be advised due to the risks of contracting HPV, but experts say that these types of conclusions are premature. Whilst oral sex may be one risk factor for certain types of head and neck cancers, at this point the link is mainly speculative. In addition to this, there are many, many other elements that play a role in whether or not someone develops cancer, including how strong their immune system is, the experts say.

 

In general, if two people are in a monogamous relationship, there is really no need for them to restrict their sexual activities as long as they are both in good health.

 

Contrary to reports, cases of head and neck cancer are not on the increase. In fact, when studied as a group, cases of these types of cancer have actually declined in the United States of America during the last 25 years. On the other hand, there has been an increase in the number of head and neck cancer amongst younger people, and these cases are primarily caused by HPV.

 

HPV is generally sexually transmitted, and the virus causes nearly every case of cervical cancer. It can also cause anal cancer and genital warts.

Categories: cancer, caused, head, HPV, nbsp, Neck, neck cancer, oral, oral sex

Could HSV-1 Infection be More Risky for Teens?

New study data suggests that an increasing number of adolescents in American lack the antibodies to protect them later in life against a significant cause of genital herpes. According to the study, fewer teens have been exposed to their childhood herpes simplex virus known as HSV-1, a common cause of cold sores, than they were years previously. Without these antibodies, teens could be more at risk when they become sexually active, leading to genital infections that are also caused by the virus, particularly oral sex. HSV-1 and a similarly related virus, the herpes simplex virus type 2 (HSV-2), both cause lifelong infections and there is currently no cure – it can go through periods where the infection is dormant after an initial outbreak. Most people develop this strain in childhood, through skin-to-skin contact with an infected adult. However, HSV-2 is only contracted sexually. Recent research has discovered that HSV-1 is becoming a significant cause of genital herpes in certain countries, according to new studies.

In the most recent study, Heather Bradley PhD looked into the prevalence of HSV-1 and 2 in 14 to 49 year olds in the U.S, using data from the National Health and Nutrition Examination Surveys, including blood samples. The data found that an increasing number of U.S adolescents lacked the antibody at their first sexual encounter, making genital herpes more of a risk from that strain. The combination of increased oral sex behaviours among young people and the increased likelihood means that adolescents could be more likely to acquire HSV-1 than previous generations. The study’s key finding is that HSV-1 seroprevalence among 14 to 19 year olds has dropped by almost 23 per cent between 1999 and 2004, and 2005 to 2010. The difference that has occurred over the past ten years represents around a nine per cent decrease in the percentage of adolescents who’ve already had oral HSV-1 as they enter their sexually active years. During this time, exposure to the virus genitally is increasingly common, meaning that the risk of genital herpes is also common.

Teens could be making the problem worse by changing their sexual practices. An unintended consequence of the success of public campaigns which aim to limit the spread of HIV have led to some people believing that oral sex is safer. Naturally, this form of sex has its own set of sexually transmitted diseases and has increased the risk of genital herpes. Up to 30 per cent of infected infants will die from this infection if they have the most severe form of the disease, according to researchers. Sexually transmitted diseases are more common now, as young people are becoming sexually active earlier than they used to and are doing so with less understanding of contraception and safe sex practices. Although many teens don’t use it, there are many forms of contraception to make sex safer, both penetrative and oral sex. Finding the right form of contraception and following safe sex practices is important for anyone who is sexually active. The best advice if you’re unsure about contraception or how to use it correctly is to speak to your local GUM clinic or book an appointment with your GP who can advise you of the best forms of contraception for your needs. They will  be able to speak to you about how to use contraception correctly, which forms are available to you and also offer regular check-ups to ensure that you remain healthy and free of sexually transmitted diseases.

Categories: genital herpes, increasing number, oral sex, safe sex, Sex, sex practices, sexually active, sexually transmitted, teens, transmitted diseases, year olds

What All Older Couples Should Know About Contracting Herpes

When you get older, you may not be thinking about your sexual health as much as you should. It is a commonly held myth that STDs such as herpes are not really present amongst older people, but in fact quite the reverse is true.

 

Herpes is particularly prevalent – between 50 and 80 percent of all adults in America have herpes. The best thing to do if you are an untested adult is to have the test. There is no point in waiting and worrying – you should go to your doctor and ask for the simple blood test that is necessary in order for you to confirm whether or not you have the disease, and what kind you have. Getting an appropriate diagnosis can help you to prevent yourself from infecting others.

 

If you have herpes, you will find that it breaks out at certain times. When you have an outbreak of herpes, you should avoid sex 100 percent of the time. Don’t just look for the obvious, noticeable symptoms – any other itching or pain could be a signal that an outbreak is occurring. It’s also worth being aware that cold sores on the mouth are a form of herpes, and if you have one of these you must avoid oral sex as you can spread the virus to the genitals.

 

Herpes can be spread through oral sex, intercourse and any skin-to-skin contact between two people. Even if you have gone through the menopause, you should use condoms, as these can prevent you from getting a sexually transmitted disease such as herpes. If you want to be extra safe, make sure that you or your partner wear a condom before any kind of foreplay or genital touching takes place. This will also protect you from all other STDs.

Categories: Herpes, nbsp, nbsp herpes, older, oral sex, people, STD, STDs

What Health Issues Do Lesbian and Bisexual Women Face?

All women have certain risks that specifically affect their wellbeing, but certain issues are particularly a cause for concern among women who have sex with women. This is not just a case of sexual health risks – although that plays a part in your wellness – but lesbian and bisexual women face an increased risk of physical and mental health problems too.

 

1. Sexually transmitted infections (STIs): Some STIs can spread between women, particularly through oral sex, sexual behaviour involving digital-vaginal or digital-anal contact, and shared penetrative sex toys. Through these means, you’re at an increased risk of human papillomavirus (HPV), bacterial vaginosis, trichomonas and HIV, so it’s important to do everything you can to protect yourself from these STIs. Make sure you get tested regularly, and that whomever you have sex with has also been tested. During oral sex, use a split-open condom, dental dam (a small piece of latex) or plastic wrap. Finally, don’t share sex toys, protect them with a condom and make sure you clean them before and after every use.

 

2. Depression: Lesbians and bisexual women might be at higher risk of depression and anxiety, especially young people who identify themselves as lesbian, gay, bisexual or transgender. This could be due to a number of factors, including social alienation, discrimination, rejection by loved ones, abuse and violence. The fear of these negative reactions causes some women to try and hide their orientation or to forgo social support, but this makes depression all the more likely for these women. Depression, when left untreated, can add to your risk of unsafe sexual behaviour, as well as a downward spiral of emotional, behavioural, health, legal and financial problems. Therefore, it’s vital that you confide in a trusted loved one, and seek help from a doctor or mental health provider.

 

3. Substance abuse: There are unique risk factors involved in lesbians and bisexual women experiencing substance abuse. You might rely on drugs or alcohol due to the stress of passing as a heterosexual or coming out, sexism, discrimination, relying on bars or clubs for socialising and peer support and the trauma of bullying, violence, abuse or self-abuse. Contact your local lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender health, mental health or community centres for substance abuse treatment or get a referral from organisations like the Gay and Lesbian Medical Association.

 

4. Domestic violence: As domestic violence is traditionally depicted as a man abusing a woman, women in a relationship with other women don’t think it can happen to them. However, domestic violence can affect anyone in an intimate relationship, so you need to watch out for the warning signs. If your partner threatens to tell others about your sexual orientation or gender identity, tells you that authorities won’t help a homosexual, bisexual or transgendered person, tells you that leaving the relationship means you’re admitting that homosexual relationships are deviant or tells you that domestic violence can’t occur in homosexual relationships or that women can’t be violent, this indicates abuse and you should tell someone – be it a friend, loved one, health care provider or other close contact. You might also consider calling a domestic violence hotline and creating a plan to leave your abuser.

 

5. Routine healthcare: Many women who have sex with women find it difficult to discuss their needs and concerns with a doctor, or to find a doctor knowledgeable about lesbian health issues. However, you need to choose a doctor who encourages you to discuss sexual issues in an easy environment, so make sure you identify yourself as lesbian or bisexual when picking your GP, and ask about routine screenings recommended for women in your age group.

Categories: Bisexual Women, domestic violence, gay bisexual, health concerns, homosexual relationships, lesbian gay, Lesbians, Mental Health, oral sex, sexual behaviour, substance abuse